RED | Bellamy Blake

Commander of Bloodshed

Through the past year that we've been on the ground, I've tried to hold my friends close. But I think all i've done is come up with excuses to keep them as far away from me as possible.

Elliot died because he wanted to find me in the midst of battle. Finn died because I got too close and he missed me too much. Riv became a bounty hunter because I turned her in to the mountain men. Clarke... well, she is just as self destructive as me.

And I don't even want to think of Bellamy because when I do all I can see is him pulling the trigger and killing the grounders.

That fact i only saved 100 haunts me.

"Quit thinking so hard." Lexa says from her place behind me. I glance up from my sitting position on the forest floor as she sits down next to me. "You are thinking too much about the past."

I glance away from her eyes, letting my tight fists go limp. "I remember their faces." I practically whisper, glancing at her. "The grounders posted outside our fence." I clarify while shaking my head. "I remember them cutting themselves and smearing their throats with their own blood just to stay alive." I blink away my tears.

"God, am I weak." I whisper, hoping Lexa didn't hear.

"No." She says, letting her hand lay on my shoulder. "You are strong." She squeezes my shoulder.

"See, I know I've been through all this shit." I scoff as I wave my hand around as if gesturing to the shit. "But, I think I've been through enough." I take a risk and glance over at Lexa. "Lost enough." I mutter.

"There's always something to lose." She says, letting her hand drop from my shoulder. "Hold Clarke closer than you think you need to." My eyebrows furrow. "She conserves herself for you." She says, her own eyebrows narrowing.

"You... tried to...?" I almost let my lips lift into a small smile. "With Clarke." I deadpan.

Lexa pauses before nodding. "She stopped me and said you were more important to her."

I press my lips together in thought, but ultimately push the idea of Clarke away.

"There are more important things to focus on." I say, standing, which makes Lexa stand with me.

——————

"Clarke." I say, getting her attention from her position by the window. Lexa walks towards Titus who is at the other end of the throne room.

"You okay?" I ask, wrapping my arms around her.

"You went one night without seeing me and you're worried?" She chuckles into my ear before pulling away.

I offer her a small smile before Lexa cuts in.

"We need to discuss the fate of the last mountain man." She says, making my eyes narrow in anger.

"I believe he deserves death." Titus cuts in, making me nod my head.

"They speak for themselves." Lexa spits.

"A slow one at that." I say, crossing my arms. "I want to deliver it."

"You see?" Titus almost smiles. "It is human nature to need vengeance. Only once satiated, can there be peace. That is our way." He says, nodding at Lexa.

"That was our way." Lexa says, shaking her head."Hailey. So, blood must not have blood applies only when it is my people who bleed?" Her eyes narrow.

"That was about stopping a war." I grit my teeth together. "This is about finishing one. I'm sorry, but if you want my advice, I agree with Titus." I say, glancing at Clarke to have her set her hand on my shoulder and squeeze. "He deserves to die for what he did."

Lexa takes a step forward and says, "I'm not looking for advice. I'm looking for a decision."

"We've made one." Clarke butts in. "He must die for what he's done."

"Then it'll be your hands that draw the blood." Lexa practically spits. "Come to me with your final decision at the end of the day." She finalises before her and Titus leave the room.

I sigh before grabbing Clarke's hand and leading her to my room. Once there, we stop by my window overlooking Polis.

My eyes lock onto Clarke's as I grab her hands with mine. "We need to do this."

Her eyes begin to water as she nods, making me let go of her hands to lay my hands on her cheeks.

"I wasn't strong enough to help Finn." I mutter. "But you were, so let me do this." I say as I watch one of her tears streak down her face.

She takes a moment before letting her hand trail up to my jawline.

"We need to do this together." She murmurs as I lower my head. "Promise?" She asks when I'm centimetres from her lips.

"Promise." I murmur before crashing my lips against hers. I trail my hand down to the hem of her shirt and run my hand along the base of it.

She responds by taking off her shirt and letting me corner her against the wall. I run my hands up her ribs and onto her neck.

I break away for a moment to take off my shirt only to have her attack my neck in a frenzy.

I don't notice that we're falling until my bare back hits the bed.

——————

"Come on." I murmur into Clarke's shoulder from my place behind her.

I go to untangle my legs from hers, but she has a tight grip on my arm draped over her waist.

"Blondie, we need to go see Emerson." I say, my smile peaking through my exasperated tone.

She groans but lets go. We get dressed and make the walk to the throne room.

We enter and I clench my jaw at the sight of Emerson on his knees and shackled in the middle of the room.

"Give us a minute." Clarke says, making all the guards leave.

I watch as Clarke walks up to him and removes his blindfold.

"Carl Emerson, Mount Weather security detail." She says, her voice tight.

His lips begin to curve into a smirk. "Wanheda." His eyes trail to me. "Jusdreinheda." His smirk widens impossibly more.

"I should've known it was you who told them how to destroy the Mountain." I grit out, my hands clenched into fists.

"I didn't destroy Mount Weather." His eyes widen as his anger grows. "You did. 381 people. 182 men. 173 women," He pauses, watching my calm exterior crack. "26 children. Two of them were mine." He finishes.

"I did what I had to do to survive." I say, before squatting down. "I know that the sincerity isn't going to show through my words, but I wish it could have been different." My lips turn down in a frown as I see sadness begin to creep onto his face. "I think about their faces everyday, and I carry their deaths on my shoulders, so do not think I came out of that mountain unscathed." My anger begins to resurface as I stand.

"You are not innocent, Hailey." He seethes. "I don't need your sympathy or your sadness. I need your death."

I lean down and grasp his collar in my hands. "The only death here is going to be yours." I spit out before dropping him.

"Will you be the one to deliver it?" He asks, a taunting look in his eye.

"Who else but the commander of bloodshed?"