"We may not have won any prizes, but we're walking away like champs."
Carnivals, the place for happiness, love and joy. The place for the thrill of adventure, as you venture into with you companions, ready to enter as a player, and walk our as a win...
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ꗃ﹕❜Title: 5/5 Interesting and Intriguing title. Captivating, original and unique.
ꗃ﹕❜Cover: 5/5 Aesthetically pleasing and creative, Color schemes match perfectly with the cloud being hair which I see as Highly creative and unique.
ꗃ﹕❜Blurb: 8/10 An interesting blurb indeed, Especially the first paragraph which does bring you in and make you want to read more. A few grammar and punctuation marks here and there and it seems not to reveal too much about the plot.
ꗃ﹕❜Hook: 3/5 Perfect Hook if the blurb didn't already entice you to read into it. Though starting with Descriptions starts with a slow pace which does make the writing go down hill.
ꗃ﹕❜Grammar & Spelling: 12/15 A little spelling mistake but your Grammar was perfect. I would say you use variation in terms of punctuation marks and appropriately distribute them in the right places.
ꗃ﹕❜Plot: 16/20 A diverse plot indeed, From the first chapter which I assume is the prologue to the first which reacts to the events of the last 7 years, I believe. The management with all the events that she's fine through plus her constant drive to suicide does create an interesting dynamic.
ꗃ﹕❜Writing Style: 7/10 Perfect! A common writing style but you gave your own twist to it making it your own and interesting and Intriguing.
ꗃ﹕❜Writing Flow: 6/10 Not something I had expected, As the pace you set in the beginning drags through the chapters yet the book is short. If you could reduce in the Descriptions it would fasten the pace by a ton.
ꗃ﹕❜Enjoyment I did highly enjoy this, From the mentions to various cultural dishes I knew and began to learn of and the familiar but unique names that can be identified in a flash.
ꗃ﹕❜Focus points:
﹕❜Imagery 8/10 Perfect, The Descriptions were top tier! Enough for the image to be described vividly. Something I noticed which I'd like you to correct, A Lot of Description is used which severely slows down the pace especially in the first chapter. It does feel like Info dumping (Giving too much information on different settings and characters at the same time) which I'd advise you to calm down on the Descriptions by a little bit as your vocabulary enough gives a vivid image.
﹕❜Characterization 8/10 Very interesting characters with diverse backgrounds and their own personalities and struggles. Q The different names are unique and original and each of the personalities used are perfect. For example, Our Main Character, Amara, personality is more observant and picks up even the smallest of details which I love. Though Amara's character development does go fast and seems to skip some pointa which I would have loved to be looked at.
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