"We may not have won any prizes, but we're walking away like champs."
Carnivals, the place for happiness, love and joy. The place for the thrill of adventure, as you venture into with you companions, ready to enter as a player, and walk our as a win...
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ꗃ﹕❜Title: 3/5
﹕❜The title was decent. I don't know if it is enough to make a reader instantly click on the story though, since I wasn’t really impressed by it to go for it but that doesn't mean it has no potential, I am sure you can try and come up with more. creative titles.
ꗃ﹕❜Cover: 4/5
﹕❜The cover is definitely beautiful, you have used a nice font for the tile but I would suggest that you should change the colour scheme a little since some of the things aren't visible. Other than that the cover is pretty nice.
ꗃ﹕❜Blurb: 8/10
﹕❜Now I really liked the shirt description of the town but I think you could have added a little more description and more of a mysterious touch. You wrote: “Y/N, a different girl. No one would have expected this to happen to her” The sentence is proper but i personally think you could have described Y/n as a normal girl because if she was different of course anything could happen to her and I think it kind of makes people cringe with all the “I am not like other girls” thing.
ꗃ﹕❜Opening Chapter: 10/10
﹕❜I really liked the first chapter of the story. You described the settings beautifully and the grammar was decent with a few minor errors. It was very well written and was perfect for an opening chapter.
ꗃ﹕❜Writing style: 9/10
﹕❜I really like the way you write, it can be seen that you try your best to describe scenes perfectly so that the readers can get the emotions of the story too.
ꗃ﹕❜Grammar: 9/10
﹕❜The grammar is pretty good except there are a few minor errors like the unnecessary usage of commas and typos. You can just go through the chapters and edit the story a little and it will be gone. Though there is a constant use of ellipses, I would suggest you should try and avoid.
ꗃ﹕❜Overall: 43/50
﹕❜Overall it was a good read. I would personally recommend it if someone wants to read some light thriller because that's what I read it as. You can work on the little mistakes in grammar here and there and think about what you want to do with the title. The story has some potential and it is on you to make your story known. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to review your book and I hope it helps you.
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