Tabula Rasa

Chapter 37

Matt arrived to work early the next day. Without Calina lying next to him, there didn't seem to be any point lingering in bed.

She'd left last night, as soon as the sun had set. They'd spent the day lounging on the couch, eating take-out and just...being together. He'd regaled her with stories from Law School and some of his more memorable outings as Daredevil; she'd told him about the new Widow's base - leaving out key geographical details, of course - and the women who were living there. They'd played some chess, and she'd read to him from one of the library books she'd left in his apartment.

That had been his favourite part of the day. Stretched out on the couch with his head on her lap, her fingers gently sifting through his hair and her soft voice filling the air...it had been pure bliss.

And while they'd both tried to enjoy the normalcy of their time together, there'd been a constant undercurrent of tension from the impending separation. And when that moment finally came, Matt found himself completely unprepared for how it would feel.

He'd sat perched on the edge of the couch, his hands dangling between his spread legs, as she'd flitted around the apartment gathering the small amount of stuff she'd brought with her. He heard her stuffing her belongings into her backpack. Lacing up her boots. And finally zipping up her leather jacket, the sound of it echoing through the apartment with a finality that made his heart clench.

"Are you sure you'll be warm enough?" he asked, grasping for something to say to break the awkward silence between them.

"Yes, I'll be fine."

"And you'll look out for anyone following you?"

"Yes," she replied. He could hear the indulgence in her voice as she placated him. "I'm going to take the long route and double back to make sure."

"Okay. Good."

She stepped between his legs and rested her hands on his shoulders. She kneaded the tense muscles as he dropped his head to rest against her stomach.

"Be careful out there," she said, leaning down to press a kiss to his hair.

"I'll be careful if you will," he replied. "Don't take any risks...but find this Volkov guy soon. Please. Then come back to me."

"I will. And thank you, Matt."

"For what?"

"For choosing to wait for me through all this."

He lifted his head at her words. Then stood up and close his arms around her. "Callie...sweetheart, there was never a choice. Of course I'll wait."

She buried her head against his neck. "But you said so yourself - this could take months. It could even be longer. I wouldn't blame you if you gave up on me-"

"Don't," he said forcefully. He tangling one of his hands in her hair and held her tightly. "Don't say that. Don't even think it. I waited my entire life for you, I'm not going to let you go now. I'll wait as long as it takes."

He felt her nod, and then her hands wound around his waist, holding him just as tightly. They stayed like that for a long time, as if trying to burn the feel of each other into their skin to sustain them for the separation to come.

Then she left.

He followed the sound of her footsteps as she snuck out onto the rooftop, then down the fire escape to the alley where she'd stashed her bike. He listened as she kick-started the engine then peeled out onto the road. He strained until his head started to hurt tracking her as she rode north...but after several blocks, the sound of her bike merged with the rest of the nighttime traffic, disappearing from his range.