Life is to Live; not to Survive

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Roseanne Wren

Laying in bed, doing nothing all day and recalling about my pending death in a few months was worrying me beyond anyone's imaginations.

And about my family, I wish they would have seen me as their daughter more than a girl diagnosed with a deadly disease.

I stared at the greenery under my feet with the airpods in my ears as there was my favourite playlist playing in it. 

Even though, there was no song which could heal my drowning heart.

Looking at the sky above, I was thinking about the good moments I spent but all I could remember was the wrong decisions I took thinking It would be better for my life.

But now, I just awfully wished to go back to my life so that I could at least live my life- MY WAY.

These past years, 

When did I feel happy for myself?

What made my heart beat faster? 

Which moment did I live happily?

Unfortunately, there was no such day I could remember......

And now when my life was going to end in just 9 months, do I really wanted to live like this? Like now,

NO, definitely not.

I want to live; and not survive just like I've been doing all these years,

I WANT TO LIVE...

EVERY SECOND...

EVERY MOMENT....

EVERY BREATH....

EVERY HEARTBEAT.....

I want to CHERISH the leftover time in my life and live life to the fullest.

And I want to fill my spoiled brain with memories that bring the purest smiles on my face and make me feel on cloud nine.

I wanted to have a moment that could allow me to be me.

I wanted to experience everything that life would offer me and for that I just need to give a chance to...

TO MY LIFE...

TO MYSELF...

And for that I just have to live; just the way I wanted

So that I could die, with no regrets.

I stood happily and walked to my room with the new hope that popped up in my mind and took a notebook from the set of diaries I used to get from my friends as gifts and filled a whole page with big letters on it,

MY BUCKET LIST

Noah Schnapp

"Any other schedules for me?" I asked my secretary as I wanted to go home early to spend some time with my lil brother Asher, because he was leaving to his new trip again.

"No sir, but..." She said hesitantly.

"What?" I asked looking at her.

"Do you know anyone named Roseanne Wren?"

"Roseanne Wren? hmm... why?"

"She was a graduate from the same school as yours."

"I seem to remember her name, she was my junior but I can't make out for the face. What's the reason behind your sudden inquiry?"

"Because we have a visitor named, Roseanne Wren who wanted to meet you. She said she was with you in high school and was in the dance club with you, she has an appointment with you and wanted to have a chat with you if you like."

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