Old Hopes & New Boots (Kelsea Ballerini x Male Reader)

Layin' It All Out

"So you want to know my whole life story huh?" I said looking at her as we made our way to my room. "Yes I do," She said, while we were changing into some pajamas... "Well...." I said...

Y/N's POV

Kelsea was sitting on the bed looking up at me, curiosity swirling in her eyes. I grabbed the stool from under my desk and placed it in front of her, "Uhm..." I said, looking down at my hands, wringing them together. My nerves were as bad as the night I sang in the bar, I felt like she was analyzing every word that left my lips and every little movement my body made. "I'm not gonna judge you Y/N, I just wanna know more about you," Kelsea said, reaching out and holding my hand. "I know darlin', I just gotta get my thoughts together," I said, looking up at her. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves, "Well... I guess I can start with my parents, they were together up until my dad passed away, I was 7, he was on his motorcycle, hit a guardrail and he was thrown from his motorcycle. He was on life support but my mom knew he didn't want that, so she had them pull the plug. I remember that day better than what I had for breakfast..." I looked up at her to see her eyes brimming with tears, "I'm sorry for your loss handsome," She said running her thumb over my knuckles. I smiled at her words and said, "Thanks sweetheart, but you don't have to cry, he's not hurting anymore and that brings me and my mama peace."

I adjusted my position on the stool, clearing my throat, "After my dad passed, I fell into somewhat of a depression, which is understandable, especially after losing a parent. My mom started heavily drinking as a way to deal with the pain of losing her high school sweetheart. Her drinking got out of control, but by this time I was only 10 maybe 11, I didn't understand what was going on, ya know?" Kelsea nodded her head, claiming she understood, so I kept going, "She would get drunk, and tell me she hated me because I looked like him. Which of course didn't help my depression, at all. This drinking went on until I was about 13 when I decided to call her out on her drinking problem, I just wanted my mom back, plus I was starting football, and I didn't need her to show up to my games drunk," I took a breath to calm myself as I remember the fight that my mom and I had that night.

"You okay babe?" Kelsea asked me as she placed her hand on my cheek. "Yeah, just remembering the fight from that night," I said looking up at her, she nodded as a way to tell me to continue. "When I called her out, we fought, worse than ever. She called me names, told me she hated me, I wasn't her kid, ya know the normal shit people say to hurt your feelings. After the name-calling and insults, I was tired of arguing and I was significantly taller and stronger than her, so I picked her up and put her in my truck, and took her to rehab. Little did I know, this would be the first of three trips that I would make to the rehab, but they weren't for my mom. After a 90-day hold at the rehab, my mom never touched alcohol again." Kelsea smiled at the relief that washed over me. "That's a good thing, babe! But who else went to rehab?" She asked. "I'll get there darlin'," I said smiling at her.

"I started my football career at 13. That's how I met my pain-in-the-ass best friend Mr.Chance Scott. He knew me as the strong nerdy kid. He was the first person I truly trusted to open up about my life. Nothing exciting happened in middle school, except our football team making states and the end stages of puberty. Like when I grew my first 3 chin hairs..." I said laughing, which in turn made Kelsea laugh. "I remember my mom told me that if I wanted to grow more, I had to shave them... Babe I shit you not, I cried so hard when they were gone..." I said laughing. "You cried over 3 chin hairs... really?" She asked as she wiped the tears from her eyes. "Yes and don't laugh it's not funny, this is a serious moment!" I said, bent over laughing.

"Okay okay it's serious, got it," She said, still chuckling but ready to listen. "When I got to high school, I still was dealing with depression, of course in an unhealthy way. I started drinking and partying as a freshman. I had a brief problem with Adderall. I didn't feel upset anymore, I could focus better in school, and I was more social. Remember those 2 other trips to rehab, one was my own. I was there for 35 days and there I finally got the help I needed, and I was able to grieve my dad without feeling judged. I came home and swore I would never do drugs again or hang out with people who did, and I stuck to it."