Dead love in my hands (Troy Otto story/ Fear the walking dead/ ftwd)

Self-reflection

I woke up alone, Troy was no nearby. To find out the time, I had to get up and walk to the sink. Picking up the watch by the strap, I was stunned: it was almost one o'clock in the afternoon. I began to wash my face. At the end of the procedure, my gaze stopped at the splattered mirror. I looked tired. Something inside of me was shaking. Thoughts covered memories from the moment of the murder of that dark-haired man on the stairs of a hotel in Los Angeles. Yes, I knew this would happen. This feeling always rolled over me the next day, when consciousness returned completely, cruelly throwing up images and scenes.

I looked at my watch again. These were much cuter than my previous ones. Most likely, Troy, of course, cared little about their beauty. I wonder where he got them? I looked at the other side. There was an inscription "Cartier". So the stones inside, under the glass, and outside the dial are diamonds... Not bad. I was not very surprised, as in my previous life I was spoiled with expensive gifts, but then they were still worth something. In addition, there was a Cartier store on La Brea, I myself bought a bracelet for my sister there as a wedding gift, which, by the way, I did not have time to give... And for sure, both about the appearance and about the brand identity of this jewelry, Troy was hardly worried, but it's a funny coincidence: the watches that Aron gave me once were also of this brand. I imagined what they looked like when I closed my eyes. There was no clear picture in my head anymore, I remembered only bright details: gold with a square dial...

Then I remembered how I found them on the nightstand with the note. It's only now that I realize that Troy found them the same night he got to the Trimbolls... Is it absolutely normal for him to live with this? He killed four people just like that, and then calmly went to get the watch? Or did he go after the watch first and then kill them? In what order was it? And when he got back to the ranch, he just went to bed... It seemed unreal to me that a person whom I already seemed to love was really capable of such a thing.

I went to the side of the bed and lay down again. I absolutely did not want to get up and go to people. I stared at the ceiling in silence, suppressing a wave of nausea from the thoughts that filled my sober mind. The prolonged reflection was broken by the opening of the door and the voice of Troy.

"Hi, it's almost 5 p.m. Actually, are you going to get up?"

It's crazy, did I lie there thinking about everything for four hours... Troy came over to the bed and held out his hand to me. I didn't take it.

"Is something wrong?" he frowned.

"Tell me, did you go after the watch first and only then killed that family?"

"What?"

"Or was it the other way around? Did you kill people and then calmly took a watch out of my car, brought it here, left a note and went to sleep peacefully?"

"What's wrong with you? Why did you decide to remember it now?"

"Just like that," I said indifferently, getting out of bed. Then I went to the window, from which I could see almost the entire ranch. Horses were grazing nearby. Leaning on the windowsill, I saw how people calmly walked and went about their business. Almost none of them knew what Troy had done. He came closer to me.

"I killed them first."

His indifferent voice brought me back to the room. I looked up from the street painting.

"What?"

"I went after the watch after I killed them."

"Okay"

"Is that all?" Just okay?"

"What did you want to hear?"

"Nothing," he continued in the same tone, "I'm going hunting with our fathers, as soon as the sun goes down, it's time for you to go out to everyone."