On Her Knees

a new question

POV: Camille

I haven't been gone long so Runa is still zoned out by the time I get back, food held mindlessly in her hand as her wrist has gone limp.

Her brows have a deep furrow between them as she stares off into the air, not even noticing I've returned until I sit opposite her and tap the table just in her view. She snaps her head up to look at me, furiously blinking as she comes back to reality.

"Still pondering if you're gay or not?" I ask, taking a croissant from the plate, tearing it apart in my fingers as I eat it since Runa clearly isn't. "You shouldn't worry about it too much right now. You have plenty of time to mull it over."

"That's not what I'm thinking about now," Runa admits.

She drops the food she had been holding onto the plate as she gives up trying to eat anything. Her hands run over her hair that is incredibly damp from her bath and sticks to the bare skin of her neck. I'm surprised she hasn't tried to dry it and tie her hair back already, but I'm not complaining. She looks so beautiful with her hair let free.

"So what's your mind on now?" I ask, covering my mouth as I fill it with food.

"Last night, I got drunk quite early on so I don't remember much but I do remember it being quite quiet. Oddly quiet for how many servants should be in the palace," she murmurs, resting her chin in her palm as she looks out of my large window.

"Perhaps they just didn't go," I suggest but she instantly shuts me down.

"That's not it. Aparently a lot of servants have either been going missing or have supposedly quit to return home," Runa explains, clearly bothered by this though I don't fully know why.

"And why is that getting you so lost in thought?" I ask, pouring myself some tea from the warm teapot on the tray of food, pouring one for Runa too, pushing it towards her.

"It's just weird to me that so many people would be summoned to the palace to work and then they'd be allowed to just leave. If that were the case, I would be long gone and at home by now," Runa grumbles, showing how sour she still is about being forced to be my maid.

"What is keeping you here?" I question her.

My mind wants her to reply that I'm the reason. That she enjoys my company so much she won't leave, though I know she won't say anything like that. It's more likely that my father bribed her with something other than money to get her to stay and tolerate me.

"Your father gave me a decent motive to stick around," she vaguely responds.

"Which is?"

"The palace pays for and provides all the medication and medical care my mother needs so I don't have to spend my money I earn being your maid on all of it," Runa elaborates, her voice cracking slightly. "It helps me feel a bit more comfortable as I'm leaving her alone at home for so long."

My heart shatters a bit with her last sentence as it reminds me how staying here has separated her from her family that she longs to be back together with. She just wants to care for her mother, who I know is severely ill from the few intimate conversations we've had.

I want to hug Runa but I know she isn't keen on me touching her without her permission. Despite that, Runa suddenly gets up and wraps her arms around me in an embrace and I feel her shudder as she begins sobbing into my shoulder.

Her body and breath is so warm as she holds me close against her and I tentatively hold her, rubbing her back as she cries into my shoulder.

Did I make a mistake bringing up why she is staying here?

"Runa, do you perhaps want to get dressed so we can go out and distract you a bit?" I offer, tapping her back.

She leans away from me and wipes her eyes, taking a deep breath before nodding. Her arms leave me as she picks up her uniform and goes into the bathroom to change, closing the door so that there's a small gap.

She takes forever in the bathroom and I hear some splashing water from the room as I sip at my tea, just waiting for her. I get the feeling I shouldn't have asked her about what my father offered her. I should have left the topic alone. I knew Runa was sensitive about anything to do with her home life so I should have assumed it would have something to do with that and left it alone.

When Runa returns I can see her eyes are obviously puffy and red from crying even after she left our hug.

"Runa, if you want to quit and go home, you can. I won't mind and I'm sure father would agree-"

"No," she interrupts, refusing to look at me now. "It's better if I stay so I can actually afford all the medicines my Mamma needs."

She starts putting my bed together and returning the books I read overnight to the bookshelf, ignoring me. Runa pauses as a knock comes from my door,obviously hoping that it isn't Phal again.

I answer it and am instantly relieved to see Sera at the door. He looks so tired with such large bags under his eyes.

"Father wants to see you," he yawns, surprising me since I've never seen him tired. Training all the new soldiers must be extremely tiring.

"What for?" I ask patiently, but he just pinches the bridge of his nose in exhaustion, not saying anything as he sighs and walks off.

I close the door and turn to Runa, who gives me a weak smile, her hangover clearly still affecting her. Even though she's tried to tidy herself up she still looks tired and in a bit of a mess. If anyone knew where she'd been last night, they could definitely guess Runa had gotten a hangover.

"I'm going to go see what my father wants and, if I get the chance, I'll ask about all the servants, okay?" I ask and Runa nods, clearly tired but is forcing herself to move around. "Please don't work too hard while I'm gone. If you need to rest, just use my bed until I get back."

Runa grumbles before waving me goodbye, clearly not appreciating me caring for her. Would she prefer I just force her to clean every inch of this room and force her to get up early?

I'm being kind to her and she's being ungrateful. She could at least thank me a little more.

"I'll be fine, Pou," she says, forcing a weak and unconvincing smile across her face. "Just go see what your father wants. And don't worry about asking about the missing servants. I doubt even if he does know that he'll tell you."

She's right. Even if I do ask, it's unlikely that he'll tell me anything.

"I'll ask anyway," I tell her, opening the door to leave. "Just don't force yourself to work if you still have a headache. I can clean up later, if there's anything to clean."

I bid goodbye to her before closing the door to my room. I don't know how Runa will pass the time by herself but I do hope she doesn't force herself to work while she's still suffering from last night and the ridiculous amount she drank.

Now to find out what my father wants from me. Its unusual for him to call me into his office, especially when I haven't done anything.