your city gave me asthma // Wilbur Soot

thirty

Claire and I zip up our black hoodies, thankful for the sun still setting early. We grab Andrew's baseball bats from her trunk and make our way up the empty sidewalk, finding Claudia's house. Her bright red Cadillac is the only one in the driveway, sitting right in the middle.

With zero hesitation, I lift up my bat and immediately start hitting the precious car. Claire follows right after me on the other side. I fight my instincts to scream as I hit every inch of the car that I can, not needing attention from her neighbors.

I've been waiting years to do something to this bitch. I've always wanted to just beat her to a pulp, but I know this will upset her way more.

After only around a minute, we hear screaming from the garage. Without looking, we sprint back to her car, speeding off as fast as possible. I wish we had more time, but the car is still pretty destroyed. Every inch of glass was shattered, dents and scratches on every side, Claire even using a pocket knife to deflate her tires.

"Holy shit," She whispers, merging onto the busy highway. "That felt amazing."

I stay silent, rubbing my hands over my face. My emotions from the last hour are finally catching up to me, the adrenaline rush gone.

Wilbur found out about Joey, and he's probably going to just dump me for good. I screwed it up by being stupid and selfish. I knew how wrong it was, but I kept doing it because it made me feel better.

"You okay, love?"

I look over at Claire with tears in my eyes. "I'm a terrible person."

She frowns and keeps her attention on the road. "Sky, no you're not. I'm the one who told you to move on for a bit. You didn't cheat. He's allowed to feel a bit uncomfortable that you had sex with one of his friends, but you did what was best for you."

"Doing what's best for me is acting like a whore?" I mutter, leaning my head back. "God, I'm a bitch."

"Skylar," She says sternly, sounding like my mother. "If you were a bitch, I would tell you so. You needed love, which Wilbur couldn't provide, so you did the right thing by pausing things with him instead of cheating. I promise, you're not a terrible person."

I don't respond, instead staring out the window. What if Wilbur doesn't see it that way? I doubt he will. At the same time, he's such a kind, forgiving person. He might take me back, but he'd keep that small hatred for me in the back of his mind.

My phone interrupts my thoughts with a text.

Joey: Hey, are you okay?

Joey: I understand if you don't wanna talk, but I just wanna make sure you're ok

Joey: I'm sorry

Me: don't be sorry. none of this is ur fault.

Joey: No, I shouldn't have showed up in the parking lot today. I shouldn't have even taken advantage of you at the party.

Me: you didn't take advantage of me Joe. i was completely sober and honestly, you saved me from possibly getting actually hurt by another guy. don't feel bad

Joey: :(

Joey: Okay.

Me: we obviously can't do this anymore though

Joey: Yeah I figured. If you ever need anything, I'm here for you.

Me: same here.

I click my phone off as Claire reaches my house. I see that both Maddie and mom are home, so I'll have to hide all of my emotions.

"Want me to stay over?"

I shake my head. "Thanks, though. And thanks for doing that to Claudia's car with me."

Claire nods with a smile. "So worth it. And stays only between us. I don't feel like getting arrested."

"Just between us." I grab my bag and get out, waving at her as she drives off. I unlock the front door and step in, kicking off my shoes and walking into the living room. Mom and Maddie are lying on the couch, watching some rom com.

"Hey honey," Mom says, smiling up at me. "How was school?"

"Fine," I tell her. "Uh, I have a ton of homework to do, so I'll be in my room."

She nods at me before I walk off, quietly shutting the door behind me. Immediately, I sink down to the floor and start sobbing, finally releasing what I've been holding in. I'm startled as the door suddenly opens, making me fall back.

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry!" Mom says, reaching down to help me up, but she sees my face. "Skylar, what's wrong?"

I want to just shake my head and tell her it's nothing, I'm fine, I'm upset about a bad grade I got. Instead, I continue crying and bury my face in my hands. She sits down and I feel her arm around me.

"Honey, tell me what's going on. Is school getting bad again? I swear, if I need to tell Claudia's parents that their daughter is harassing mine again, I will-"

"It's me, mom," I sigh, unable to look at her. "I'm an awful person. I think Wilbur is officially going to end things with me. Completely end things. No June to look forward to."

"What?" She whispers, stroking my arm. "Why do you think?"

I hesitate telling her anything. My mother doesn't need to know that while she's been working her ass off every day, I've had a boy over, fucking her daughter. She knows Eli and I had sex, which was already too much for her to know.

"I've been lonely so I've been flirting with one of his friends from London. We kissed and he found out."

"Well, you guys are on a break." Mom says. If it was just a kiss, none of this would be a big deal. I wish it was only a kiss. "Surely he won't do that. He can understand. I promise, baby, it'll all be okay."

"What's up?" Maddie asks, suddenly stepping over us and sitting down, grabbing my hand.

"Wilbur found out that I kissed Joey. I think it's over."

"Oh," She whispers, knowing the full story. "I'm so sorry, Sky."

"Can I be left alone, please?" I ask, wiping my face with my shirt. "I appreciate you guys but I just need to be alone."

They both hesitate, but agree to leave, both giving me hugs before going back into the living room. I stand up and take off my clothes. I look in my closet and search in the back, finding all of Wilbur's clothes. I pull one one of his hoodies and his basketball shorts, grateful they still have his smell. I walk around my room and lift back up my pictures of Wilbur, some of just him, just us, or the whole friend group back in London. God, I miss them so much. None of this would be happening if I were still there.

I know I should've stayed.