Got some funny ideas while writing the next chapter. Enjoy :3
—
(Therapist Green checking with Time in how Sabre is doing)
Green: And has there been any progress on his issue with insomnia?
Time: Oh, you wouldn't believe how much it's improved. Since the creatures got here, that's helped a lot, but even before then I figured out something else that helps.
Green: Oh, wonderful! And what's that?
(Time points to Sabre, who's asleep on the couch and wrapped up in a blanket, with various blobs with him sleeping too.)
Time: Weighted blanket.
Green: Let me guess, you threw it at him jokingly once and it actually worked?
Time: ...How did you-
Green: You've both been to sessions with me. I know you.
—
(Most of the blobs are sleeping in Sabre's room with him, it's the middle of the night. Two chaotic siblings are still awake.)
Squirrel: Pssssst, Sammy, what time is it?
Samael: Dunno. Pass me that horn and I'll find out.
(Squirrel scoots a horn that was being played with earlier to Sammy, and he takes a deep breath and blows into it. The noises wakes up all of the blobs, and of course, Sabre.)
Sabre: (Quickly sitting up, half-asleep, possibly having some flashbacks) WHICH ONE OF YOU GOBLINS IS PLAYING A HORN AT 2AM-
Samael: (Knows dang well he's about to get grounded) It's 2AM.
—
(Sabre and Time sitting in the living room on the couch, both reading. Blobs are playing in the other room.)
(Sabre suddenly looks up and listens for a little bit.)
Time: Sabre-?
(Sabre gets up, jumps over the back of the couch, and runs into the other room)
Sabre: WHO'S EATING PLASTIC-
—
(Sabre sitting at the table surrounded by blob chaos, holding a cup of coffee.)
Sabre: If this keeps up, I'm gonna start needing blood pressure medication.
Time: (Walking in) Sabre, did you brew pure caffeine into your coffee-?!
Sabre: (Sipping the coffee) You don't know that.
Time: Yes I do, because you left the caffeine powder next to the coffee grounds! Do I have to tell the Green Leader you're doing this again?
Sabre: ...no.
Time: Then pour that out and make normal coffee, you're gonna make yourself have a stroke.
Sabre: ...
(Sabre looks Time dead in the eyes and starts chugging the coffee)
Time: SABRE-
—
Violet Bandit: (Looking at the very suspiciously death-and-rot-obsessed higher ranking people of the bandit syndicate) I believe I've gotten myself into something way more dangerous and creepy than I thought it was.
—
Light: (Talking to the Professor) Look, you need to stop trying to experiment on the creatures.
Prof. Red: Why not? Sabre never catches me and I never actually do anything to them.
(Light puts a hand on his shoulder.)
Light: Professor. You don't get it. The Leaders and I have no control over what he does once you tick him off like that. There will be a day where you can't outrun him, and to warn you, we're not going to be able to do anything about it. We cannot guarantee your safety if that day comes, or your life if you screw up an experiment bad enough.
Prof. Red: ...
Prof. Red: I'm still gonna do it.
Light: Professor-
—
(A common occurrence in these two's household, even before the blobs)
Time: Why do you keep bringing that possum in the house?!
Sabre: (Feeding a possum apple slices) Hey, Jerry just wanted some food!
Time: How many times have I told you, 'no more bringing random animals in the house'?! Especially that possum! It keeps scratching at the front door now because you keep letting it in!
Sabre: I don't know what you're so mad about, Jerry hasn't done anything! He's chill!
Time: It's a wild animal! And for the last time, stop feeding it, it's already the fattest possum I've ever seen.
Sabre: (Covering Jerry's ears) You take that back-
—
(Colorless Guard headquarters. Two guards are positioned at the front door.)
Light: (Walking in, annoyed and mumbling to himself) I swear, he gets more ridiculous every day-
Guard 1: What'd he do this time, sir?
Light: (sighs) He was training a falcon and a hawk to send rocks through the Professor's windows.
(Light walks off, and the second Guard turns to a small chalkboard that has 'Days Since Sabre's Pulled Some Bulls***' written at the top, and a 3 written under it. The Guards erases the 3 and writes a 0, making all of the guards in the area laugh.)
—
Alrighty, back to writing chaos
YOU ARE READING
Incorrect Quotes
HumorI'm just gonna post here when I'm bored or want to write shenanigans. Will take suggestions, as long as it's not ships. These take place in both Sabre's series (SS, RQ, SL, TR) and AUs, both mine and ones that used to be mine but have new owners. Ma...
