Stars Aligned | ✓

45

Chapter Forty-Five
"I keep those for you"

× SAHIL ×

I miss her.

I miss her a lot.

I miss her so fucking much.

I miss her so much that I wish to buy a helicopter and give her a visit. Though I'm not that rich.

I miss her so much that I want her beside me right now.

I don't know anything. I just miss her.

I kept wasting the ink of the pen and drew circles on the paper aimlessly. The messy lines were like my mind without her. The pressure on the pen increased just like the pressure on my mind, leading to the paper dividing into two pieces, just like my heart.

I couldn't even confess to her. Dammit.

You're my best friend, Ananya.

What was I high on when that sentence came out of my mouth instead of confessing my feelings?

I did not even realize how and when she became such an important part of my life that surviving a few months without her was so difficult. I was so used to her presence around me most of the time, let it be just as friends.

If I just get to spend time with her as friends then I wouldn't even want to take things further. I just want her around me all the time, I don't want any tag of relationship.

I want to breathe in the same air as hers. I want to live in the same place as hers. I want to exist in her life. I would absolutely love it if it is as a main character, but if it's not, then I'm even ready to become a tiny bug present in her house all the while. I want to be around her. I want to be hers.

These feelings I caught for her, the way every time a small smile appeared on my face whenever someone mentioned her name, the way one video call from her would make my mood take a 360-degree turn, one notification from her and all my important work seem less important now.

I felt everything after a long time and I just know it is not just attraction. It's more than that. A lot more than that. It is probably a part of falling in love with someone and realizing it all the way.

I already fell for her a long time ago but never realized it. But that day when I saw her crying, sobbing, breaking down when I got to know her story when I got to see the world from her eyes, I fell in love with her story, her journey, her struggles, her ability to still love life and her. All of her, every bit of her.

Anyone could easily fall in love with her goofy side, she is built like that, to spread laughter, happiness, and love. But the version of her that was broken by many, the one who is still strong, the one who does not want anyone to save her, but hear her. Read here. Inside out.

That version. I loved the broken her a lot more times than I love her because that one doesn't want love, it needs love.

I never wanted to be the person who would love someone's perfection, everyone does that, everyone loves perfection. I wanted to love someone's imperfections which have to be present to make them perfect.

Ananya might be tired of hearing compliments about her confidence, how her sunshine nature is, how she nails her professional work, and how she fights and stands for herself, and the people around her. I'm very sure she has heard this from many.