[KULANI]
I am watching the gorgeousness of this man as he moves about in the room, packing his bag. This is the first time Vutlhari did not give me problems when I put him down in his cot. Mhan’ Singi said I shouldn’t get used to sleeping with him on the bed because we might suffocate him to death. He hasn’t realised that I’m awake. I check the time and I find a few minutes past seven.
‘Do you know how handsome you are Mr Ngobeni?’ I ask and he immediately laughs.
‘Morning baby’. He comes to kiss my cheek and goes to his underwear and sock drawer. ‘How did you sleep?’
‘I feel well rested so, I think I slept well’ I respond and continue enjoying the warmth of my sheets.
‘That’s good. No weird dreams?’
‘Nope. How did you sleep?’
‘Sprained my neck and lost all blood supply in my left arm because of somebody’
I laugh out loud. He mustn’t start.
‘You’re the one who loves being the big spoon though. In fact you never allow me to cuddle you from behind’
‘Because it feels weird, that’s why’
‘But why didn’t you tell me that you weren’t sleeping okay? Now I feel bad’
‘Because for once after giving birth, you were sleeping peacefully. How does a man begin to disrupt that?’
‘Aww… thank you baby’
He kisses me again and walks to the ensuite. Kurhula’s most prominent love language is physical touch and I’ve gotten used to it. Especially because I was the type of person who needed to defrost first in the morning. I follow him to the bathroom and go brush my teeth while he does his skincare. I get done and hug him from behind with my eyes closed. I’m going to miss him and because of this fact, my heart hurts. He turns around with half-absorbed moisturizer on his face.
‘I wish you didn’t have to go’
‘I’ll be back before you can even blink, baby’
I know he’s leaving with her. He’s her mentor and he’s going away on work. I won’t even ask because hearing it might ruin my day. He starts pecking my lips endlessly until I get tired of being bent. I try to get away but he has me trapped.
‘Baby man!’ I complain. My tummy even hurts from all the laughing because he’s tickling me. My bonnet falls off during this silly fight between him and I. I’m trying to escape his hold and he is insistent on showering me with kisses.
‘Baby please let me go. My stomach hurts’
He stops and smiles.
‘You’re such a beautiful soul, do you know that?’
I’m still laughing and trying to catch my breath. Eish, this person. I am tired. I run off when he tries to reach me and he chases after me. He blocks the door and I run back to the other side of the bed.
‘Come here kas’ wo yini nah?’
He’s standing on the opposite side.
‘Please stop. I can’t breathe’
‘Same here. You take my breath away each time’
‘This smooth tongue of yours will get you in trouble one day’
‘I’ll know that you’re bewitching me because so far it has only managed to get me out of trouble’
I’m defeated.
‘Come here before I get you myself’
‘You’ll never catch me’ I challenge him with a look. He scoffs.
‘I used to play sport. You know this, right?’
‘Who hasn’t?’
‘You’re comparing netball to soccer?’ he gives me no chance to reply. He climb the bed, took one step, and jumped off to get to me.
‘Mama!!!’ I yell when he catches me off guard. Vutlhari saves me when he starts crying from his cot.
‘The baby… the baby’ I quickly say and he laughs. He pulls me back when I try to get him.
‘This isn’t over’ he threatens. Kurhula is such a bully. I wonder what kind of a child he was. I have a mental image and I want none of my kids turning out like that otherwise I’ll age young.
He goes and carefully gets him out. Vutlhari quietens down as he plays with him.
‘Good morning daddy’s boy’
‘That’s going to be a mommy’s boy’ I provoke him. He can’t do anything to me with Vutlhari in his hands. He straightens his back and looks at me with that ‘Are you sure you wanna do this?’ smile.
‘I’m just stating facts’ I reinforce while making the bed.
‘Tell your mom that her application to cry will be approved sooner than later if she carries on like this’ he says to Vutlhari. I laugh out loud and change my clothes. He’s starring at me. At my bxxbs, specifically. He’s so obsessed with these milk-filled bulbs. Men are such babies.
‘See something you like?’ I ask while pulling my skirt up. He’s literally salivating behind that smile.
‘Why are you torturing me?’
‘How am I doing that?’ I’m brushing my hair up with no top on.
‘You know I can’t have you right now but here you are, flaunting what I can’t have’
‘Hhawu. I am simply getting dressed and you are being a pervert’
‘The day you heal Kuli… you better say a little prayer when I get my hands on you otherwise I’m gonna force you to scream it in tongues’
I explode in laughter.
‘Stop saying such things in front of Vutlhari’
He starts changing his stinky nappy.
‘No don’t, baby. It’ll be a waste of diapers because he has to bath anyway’ I stop him and he understands.
‘I fear the day when these boys are all grown and start dating. You are going to have such a hard time and I’ll be laughing through it all’
‘AK and Tlhari will not date until they get to their final year in varsity’ I state while clipping my bra.
‘Are we talking about my sons here or have we changed the topic? I won’t allow you kurhi uva endla tibharhi. No son of mine is going to become an incel on my watch’
‘They won’t be’ I argue.
‘You want to turn them into late bloomers?’ he laughs. ‘Whole Valambya? Late bloomers? I’d like to see you try’
‘Give me my baby please’
‘You’re saying “my” like this isn’t my nut. Ikendze ra mina lerhi’
Kurhula and swearing! I don’t know how many times I have to reprimand him for this.
