The second wife

Chapter 10

Akiko P.O.V.

My morning sickness and nausea is much worse than it was with Tian. I've been able to hide it, but if it keeps up like this, I won't be able to for long. This is why I want my room back. "How long did you think you were able to hide this?" I hear Mao Mao behind me. "If I were in my own room, I would be able to for a lot longer" I answer, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. "But you're not" Mao Mao says. "I'm not" I sigh, standing back up. "Please don't say anything to him. Not yet" I say. "I think he already knows" Mao Mao says. I look at her. "He's been keeping a closer eye on you, since Tian's death. Because you had two losses in a short time, he was worried" she says shrugging. "So he noticed your nausea and asked me if I knew anything. I told him that I didn't, but it's not that hard to figure out" Mao Mao adds. I sigh again. "I'm sorry" I say, honestly. "You don't need to be. I have no desire to get pregnant. I'm fine with it if you birth all his heirs" Mao Mao says with a smile. "That makes me feel like an animal you keep, to get prized pups" I say. "I don't mean it like that." She says. "I know you don't" I say. "What are you two doing there?" I look up to see Jinshi at the end of the hallway, with Basen right behind him. "Nothing" Mao Mao says, but of course this makes him walk over. "Nothing?" He asks. "Nothing" Mao Mao repeats.  "Why does it smell like vomit?" Jinshi asks. "Because I don't feel so well. Mao Mao found me and was about to take me back to the room" I say. Jinshi looks at me, at Mao Mao and then back at me. "Are you alright?" He asks. "I'll be alright. I'm just going to need my special tea, and some rest" I say. Jinshi looks a little suspicious. "Alright. I'll come to check up on you later then" he says. "Yes, alright. Bye bye now" Mao Mao says and then quickly pulls me with her. "You've got to tell him sooner or later" she hisses when he can't hear it anymore. "I know. But let me get used to the idea, and get rid of the fear" I say.

"You're with child, aren't you?" Mao Mao and I almost spit out our tea. Jinshi smiles. "I assume that's a yes" he says. "H-how?" I ask, but don't even know how to finish the rest of that sentence. "I've been keeping an eye on you" he says. "I see" I sigh. "Well now you know why I want my room back" I say. "You both can move back by the end of next week" Jinshi says. "My love.." Jinshi says. "Yes. I'll taste everything she eats and drinks. She's usually around me anyway" Mao Mao says. "I don't want to be a chore" I say. "You're not. And who knows? I might get to taste a nice poison" Mao Mao says with a smirk, and I can't help but smile amused. "You don't seem very happy" Jinshi says. "I'm..." I hesitate. "I'm mostly afraid" I say. Jinshi frowns slightly. "I know. Believe it or not, I am too" he says. "But it won't be like last time. I promise" he says. "How can you be so sure?" I ask. "For one, you're taking different herbs than before. One your body is more used to" Mao Mao says. "And we're eliminating the chance for you to be able to digest poison" Jinshi adds. "By having Mao Mao taste everything?" I ask. "Mostly, yes. But you'll have more protection" Jinshi says. "I don't want to be isolated, held prisoner Zuigetsu-sama. I'm lonely enough as it is" I say. "You won't be. Don't worry about that" Jinshi says. I can't help but sigh again. "Yeah, well, we will see how it goes" I say. "I know it may be difficult because of what happened, but please try to be happy. It's a good thing." Jinshi says. Good for you, or good for me? Basen walks in, over to Jinshi and whispers something in his ear. Jinshi nods. "Please excuse me, I have to go" he says, standing up. "Try to get some rest. Both of you" he says and then leaves with Basen. It's immediately silent as soon as the door closes. "It's kind of obvious that you're not happy" Mao Mao says. "I know. I need to wrap my head around it. I will be happy about it. I'm use eventually" I say and run my hand through my hair. "As soon as I get rid of the fear."

Somehow, as soon as I'm back in my own room, I'm able to breathe. Even though I'm starting to love Jinshi, which is strange in itself in this situation, and I like Mao Mao, being with them 24/7 was really starting to suffocate me. They sure made it pretty. A lot of natural light. I hang the broken furin near the new windows, and Tian has his very own memorial altar, right next to my fathers. I light incense at both of them and place a treat as an offering. I place my hands together in prayer where I wish that they both are well and that they're not disappointed in me for being pregnant again. Then I turn around to quickly lay back in bed. "You know, you're not doing either of us any good by making me so dizzy and sick" I say, placing my hand on my stomach. I close my eyes as I suddenly feel very tired. I think I can actually sleep again. I open my eyes when the door opens. "Are you satisfied with the room?" Jinshi asks. "I was satisfied the way it was" I say. "But it was quite dark" he says. "I do enjoy the light" I say. "Are you alright? You're a bit pale" Jinshi asks, placing his hand on my forehead. I close my eyes for a second as I enjoy his cold hand, and open them again as he takes it from my forehead and put it on my cheek. "I was a bit dizzy earlier, so I laid down" I say.  Jinshi takes his hand from my face and places it on my stomach. "Shall I have them make rice porridge for you?" Jinshi asks. I pull a face, feeling nauseous by the idea. "Broth then?" He asks. I nod. Jinshi turns to the door. "I'll let the kitchen and Mao Mao know" Basen says and the door closes. "Hey you. It's not nice to make mommy so sick" he says softly. "It doesn't hear you yet" I say. "That doesn't matter. He will know I'm here"  Jinshi says smiling. "How do you know that it will be a boy?" I ask. "Instinct" Jinshi winks. "Get some rest, and try to eat something when they bring it over. You're going to need it when he makes you so dizzy" Jinshi says, pressing a kiss against my forehead. I sigh as he leaves. I'll finally have a good night sleep.