burn. mark sloan

14

I was filing out paperwork trying to distance myself from anyone, there's no telling what I could say. My sad attempt to stay away from my friends didn't work when Callie came up to me.

"I slept with another guy. Do I tell George?" Callie question completely took me off guard.

"I kissed Mark Sloan the one guy my bestfriend hates. Do I tell him? No I don't."

"I have to tell George." Callie told me before I could tell her what I think she should do. I do think she should tell George, he deserves to know. Derek on the other hand doesn't need to know that I had one drunken kiss with Mark Sloan. That I for one can't even remember.

"Yes you do." I told her as my stomach growled and we both pretended to not notice it.

"You can't judge me."
"I don't judge."
"Yes, yes you do. You literally are known for having a judgy face around here."

I continued to file out paperwork when another one of my best friends. Can't these people tell I'm awkward, nervous, stressed, rude, and fucking hungry for food and in desperate need for a workout session? It was George who is always the first to know when something is bothering someone.

"What's wrong?" George asked as he joking put an arm around me.

"Nothing." I replied through gritted teeth. What's wrong is I feel guilty for kissing Mark. I knew Derek hated him and I still did it.

"You're lying."

"And you're annoying! Don't you anything better to do? I bet they need help with rectal exams." I tell him in a loud voice just so Bailey would hear it and send him down to help which she did.

I continue with the paperwork that Sloans making me fill out for him, I am also supposed to be getting him a coffee but I'll do this first just to keep him waiting. As I finally finished I felt someone else's presence next to me, I look up and see Derek looking down at me.

I immediately trying to think of an excuse to leave. I feel my hand sweating, my stomach rumbling, my mind fighting off any desire for a workout of to be rude.

"Mark and Addison wasn't just a one night stand type of thing. They lived together for two whole months. After she convinced me it was a one time thing. I don't need this. I don't like unnecessary drama. It's over. It happened. I just want Seattle, I want Seattle and to never have to see either of them again." Derek ranted making me feel even more guilty for what I've done. If you look at what I did compared to cancer or climate change it's nothing but to Derek Shepherd it is a major betrayal.

"Yea-yeah. I- I agree." I uttered then let out a sigh.

Before he could ask me what's wrong Mark came up to us.

"Allen, coffee now!" Mark demanded and I was more than happy to continue to avoid Derek.

"We're talking, you can walk downstairs and get your own coffee Mark." Derek told him so I stayed. It was obvious Mark only wanted to get Derek alone, he didn't want a coffee. The coffee here is never brewed right it's basically brown water.

"She told you. I've known you my whole life, I grew up with you so I know what you're thinking. That's a year of your life wasted trying to make it work with Addison, when you could've been with Meredith. That you could've been happy right now. That all this... everything... that you and Meredith could've had a real chance. Still... I thought you should know the truth. I thought I owed you that. As a friend." Mark told him sounding kinda sincere but my stomach rumbling interrupted before he could say everything.

"You're not my friend." Derek told him and walked off.

"What about bromance Derek?" I called out but he was long gone. His long legs come in handy for walking fast.

"You killed your bromance for a girl? What about bros before hoes?" I turned to Mark to asked with a glare. It's basically his fault for being so hot that I had to kissed him to make Alex jealous. Gosh I hate Alex.

"Go get my coffee." Mark told me so I walked away to "get his coffee" but we both know I am not doing that.

I went into the elevator and before the doors could shut George was next to me. "I'm gonna keep asking until you tell me. What's wrong?"

"I kissed Mark Sloan to make Alex jealous after he slept with an old hag, and I can't tell Derek or else he'll think of it as some massive betrayal." I blurt as I get off the elevator, he follows. I take him to the physical therapy unit and start running on the treadmill. He just stands there and watches for a second.

"Then just don't tell Derek?" George suggested as he gave me a drink of water.

"You don't understand. I can't lie about anything. I can't keep any sort of secret if it's mine. It all just goes down hill. Secrets make me awkward and nervous which cause stressed that causes me to be disgusted by food and all I want to do is just work out. Oh and if I'm hungry I'm just plain rude." I rant once again to my bestest friend of all, just don't tell any of my best friends.

"Tell him."

"I will...tomorrow." I let out wanting to just hold off on making Derek's day any worse than it probably already is.

953 words
"secrets i have held in my heart are harder to hide then i thought"