☕️NO ONES POV:☕️
Open to the Infinetentiary in the year 207̃012.
Blendin Blandin has escaped from prison and is wearing a cloak, Lolph and Dundgren are chasing him.
Deep Voice: Halt!
Dundgren: I've got to hand it to this perp, no one's broken out of the Infinitentiary before.
Lolph: He's either the bravest time convict I've ever seen, or the dumbest.
Blendin Blandin: (Turns and runs into wall) Ow! (Stumbles into barrels and falls over causing his face to be revealed) Oh! My time-knee! Oh, time-dang it!
Dundgren: Definitely the dumbest.
Lolph: Freeze! You're surrounded by the Time Paradox Avoidance Enforcement Squadron. Anything you say can and already has been used against you in future court.
Dundgren: This is it, Blendin. End of the timeline. Any last words?
Blendin: Uh-uh-uh-uh-I-I-I-I... I INVOKE GLOBNAR!
Crowd: (Talks about Globnar)
Dundgren: Very well, speak the name and century of those accused.
Blendin: The three kids that ruined my life: Dipper and Mabel Pines and Y/N L/N. 21st century.
Dundgren's tablet searches and finds a clip of Dipper and Mabel hitting each other with baseball bats and laughing as you just float upside down. The clip is shown on every screen in the shot, with the words "GLOBNAR TRIBUTES" over it.
Lolph: So be it. May Time Baby have mercy on their souls.
🎶🎧Cut to theme song.🎧🎶
✨Cut to Dipper, you, and Mabel standing in front of a vending machine at the Mystery Shack, inserting coins, pressing selection buttons and eagerly anticipating candy.✨
Dipper, you, and Mabel: Candy! Candy! Candy!
The vending machine attempts to drop a bag of candy, but it gets stuck.
Dipper: No! It's trapped!
You: Booo! (Kicks vending machine)
Mabel: Everything is terrible forever!
Soos: Psst. Hey, dudes! You wanna know a trick? (Hits vending machine with hands and elbow) Bibbity-boop. Wop! (Vending machine opens) A genius taught me that once. (Grabs candy from the machine) This just in: weather stations are calling for a... candy blizzard! (Throws candy on them)
You: AWESOME! (Shoves candy in mouth)
Mabel: Forget taking off the wrappers! I'm eating these now! (Stuffs handfuls of unwrapped candy into mouth)
Dipper: Soos, you are the greatest human ever to live
Mabel: Agh! Oh! (Choking) That was a mistake! (Collapses)
You punched her back for her to cough up the wrappers as you chug down half the candies.
Soos: Hey, no sweat, dude. (Putting money in machine) I'd do anything for the Pines family.
Stan: (in background) Soos! I need to scratch myself in two places at once!
Soos: And I mean anything! Coming Mr. Pines! (Walks away)
YOU ARE READING
DERPY KIND! Gravity falls (reader insert)
FanfictionA derpy and nonchalant 12 year old goes on the adventures of this wacky town with the pine twins. Not knowing the cost of earning people's heart and trust, your derpy and adhd self is quite the catch. Mable: CAN WE KEEP THEM?! Dipper: WHAT?! I mea...
