solangelo oneshots

"I miss him."

TW Depression, self harm

"Hey!" Nico said excitedly, surprising Will with a hug from behind. He sat down next to him with a smile on his face.

"Hey! What's got you so happy?" Will asked, catching the grin from Nico.

"I can't just be happy?" Nico said, kissing the back of Will's hand. Will continued smiling but he still worried about Nico. He knew how depression worked, especially Nico's. Nico acts unusually happy, next thing Will finds him on the bathroom floor in tears with a pool of blood around him. Will never knew how to react to this happiness. He didn't want to seem too skeptical, so he reflected the excitement back to his boyfriend.

"Guess what I did today!" Nico said, cutting through Will's thoughts and bringing him back to reality.

"Did you shower? Your hair smells good," Will asked.

"Well, yeah but something else!"

"I'm stumped. What?"

"I ate breakfast! Like, a full breakfast. Mr. D was so proud of me and I was too. And! And...I remembered my meds today before you even told me!" Will smiled bigger. He put his hands on both sides of Nico's neck.

"I'm so proud of you. That's a big deal, Neeks." He pulled Nico in and kissed him. Nico pulled away, bubbling with more excitement.

"And I did my laundry. I know you have been nagging me for weeks about that." Will's smile faltered. Only slightly, but Nico caught it. "What?"

"Nothing. I'm happy that you're happy."

"No, you stopped smiling a little. What's wrong?"

Will hesitated. "Nothing."

"Tell me!"

"I don't want to talk about it right now. Here c'mon, let's get some tofu stir fry, Percy said it's amazing," Will said, trying to change the subject. Nico sighed and stood up. He put his hand out for Will to grab.

"Can you come with me? For a moment?"

"What?" Nico pulled him by the arm.

"Just come with me!" Nico dragged him to the woods, getting out of earshot of everyone else. "What is the matter? You don't seem happy, you seem...I don't know, worried? Scared? Are you mad at me for something?"

"No! No Nico, I'm not mad," Will said, taking both of Nico's hands.

"What's your problem, then?" Will sighed deeply.
"Nico...I'm worried about you. I always am. I love you, Nico. I've noticed a pattern in you. Every time you come to me super happy, I find you the next day surrounded by your own blood and tears. I want to see you happy, I really do! But not...not fake. You don't have to..pretend for me! Don't lie to me." Will realized he was crying. He had moved during his speech, and now he and Nico were a couple feet apart. Nico's expression was hard to read. His eyes were spilling over with tears. Suddenly, he ran forward and wrapped his arms tightly around Will's torso. Will returned the favor, crying into Nico's hair. They stayed like that for a while, until Nico pulled away, sniffling.

"What's wrong, Nico? Talk to me."

"I...I miss him."

"Who- Oh...Jason." A sob escaped Nico's mouth. More tears fell down his face. Will took a deep breath. He slowly nodded and pulled Nico back into his arms. Nico sobbed into his shirt.

"Neeks...I love you. I need you to talk to me," Will said, stroking Nico's hair.

"It's just so...so hard. I don't want to make you feel like I loved him more." Will sighed. He had to admit, he was jealous sometimes about how upset Nico was about Jason's death. It wasn't fair of him, he knew that. But he couldn't help it. Nico was always sad about it. It was dickish of Will to feel like that. The guy died. He was the first person to accept Nico as a queer person. But Will always had a nagging feeling that Nico had had a crush on Jason, because they were so similar. Jason having the same height, blonde hair, and blue eyes made Will insecure and self conscious.

Jason made Will think maybe Nico did have a specific type.

"I'll admit, I feel like that sometimes, but it's not fair to you. You lost him. That's a big deal. It's not your fault."

Nico was quiet for a moment. "I'm sorry," he finally said in a low voice.

Will pulled Nico away from him and pressed his palms to Nico's cheeks. "Don't you ever be sorry for my actions." He pulled him back in and hugged him tight.

Nico couldn't help but smile a little. "Ok, Sunshine."

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