New World

Chapter Twenty-five

Back to Savi's POV >>>

Spying on Sophie and Keefe was pointless.

It wasn't like her parents ever did anything interesting. She had absolutely refused to spy on Sophie's toilet habits, even though Fox insisted Sophie might be doing something secret in the bathroom.

And Cerulean had been acting very, very oddly. He'd always been caring, but he was always there now. He'd go when she wanted him to, but she wasn't sure if she wanted him to go, she just... She wasn't ready for love, and she never would be. It messed up every good storyline and she wasn't about to ruin hers. It was already ruined enough.

The sooner she respected the fact that she'd never be the one for him, the better. Cerulean was so... Nice. If he hadn't been prejudiced against, if life hadn't twisted him this way, he'd never have joined the Neverseen. Why would he? She could easily picture him as a Vacker living in one of their pretty castles.

Whereas her? She'd been born with everything Cerulean should have had, but she didn't even know what to do with it. She was an introvert. That kind of unwanted attention didn't gel well with her. She was a loner and always would be. The kind of looks she got from having Sophie and Keefe as parents were just wrong.

She didn't resent her parents as much as she used to, but she had to stay here, with the outcasts, where she belonged. Because she'd never have a say in the matter. Gisela would never let her go now, and she understood that. Besides, she didn't want to go.

It was stupid, but she didn't want to leave Cerulean. She didn't know what was going on between them, and it was an awkward mess, but leaving the one person she still cared about was just terrifying. She wouldn't be able to talk to anyone. She was already restricted enough with him.

Even still, it would be better for her to be gone. Not gone as in with Sophie and Keefe, but gone from this world. Would the Elvin world be better off forgetting her very existence?

Of course they would. She was nothing. An outcast. Someone who would never fit in to society no matter how hard to try. They would have to understand. Why would they, though? Why would those Councilors dressed in their pretty regal finery ever understand anything an outcast faced?

They had been accepted their whole lives, never branded because of their family, and once they were Councilors, they were pretty perfect, and no one really questioned them. Their word was law.

And her parents. Her thoughts soured. They'd been through their fair share of bad times, but now they were determined to pretend the Elvin world was perfect again when it would never be. She was clear proof of that. She and the entire organization called the Neverseen.

And now it was time to leave. Time to leave everything she knew, everything she called home. But the truth was, she didn't have a home anymore.

She raised the dagger blade to her neck and felt it draw blood.

"Savi! Stop!"

Her hand faltered and the blade passed a few inches from her neck, slashing at the air. She instinctively hid it behind her cloak, but if her bleeding neck wasn't proof enough, the fact that Cerulean had called her to stop pretty much confirmed that he'd seen exactly what she'd been about to do.

"Savi," Cerulean whispered. He wrapped his arms around her, and she stood awkwardly, unsure of whether to hug him back or push him away.

She eventually decided on the latter, but was astonished to find she was crying. She swallowed the lump in her throat and stepped out of his embrace.

"It isn't what you think it was," she said, letting the blatant lie go through her teeth.

He cocked an eyebrow, although there was worry and concern laced there. "You're sure? I've seen how you've been around Sophie and Keefe, and... Savi, you weren't trying to kill yourself, were you?"