Undefined Love. (BOOK #1/ COMPLETED) (EDITING)

Anything is Everything.

Cheyenne--

I just got home from Tyrells place. I feel disgusting with myself and my decisions.

I know I shouldn't have done that to Keyon, but I was just living in the moment. The fact that I fucked the dude, right after I broke up with Tyrell just throws me off. How could I ? and to make matters worse.. I didn't even know the whole story for me to just go off. But you have to admit, If that was you Im pretty sure yall would've been mad too.

But oh no, don't get me wrong! Tyrell is not no victim either. Dudes, just as guilty as I am for calling her over. That shows no loyalty towards me. I mean fuck! She shouldn't even be in his phone, like come'on. The bitch ruined us, and you letting her back into our lives is basically letting her come back into her lives again.

Thats how I see it.

Tyrell and I need to have a 1 on 1 talk. No arguing, just talking. I can not stress that enough. Were currently not together but I know he will be mad about the Keyon thing. Im still surprised at what he was about to do, like yea I mean we've talked about things like that and how'd he do without me but like who believes that stuff? That's the type of stuff you hear but in reality it doesn't happen and yall just eventually end up going your separate ways.

That's how love works sometimes.

I just don't know.. I don't even know If I wanna get back with Tyrell right now. Im stressed, he's stressed. My face is breaking out, its just too much right now, I love him.. But does love exist here?

I signed onto Facebook, scrolling down my feed.

I saw that Keyon made a status.

Keyon Swerving

I love her, I want her. But can I have her? ... That's what stops me.

I half smiled but I had to let it go back down.

I decided to write him on there.

Uh hey Keyon,

Its Cheyenne (obviously), Umm..I wanted to talk in person but honestly at this point..I just think we should take a break from being friends. Yes I know what happened lastnight, and no Im not 'playing' you or whatever..I just need to focus on me. I done know what I want and summers approaching. We're about to be seniors next year, and I need to get myself together. To be honest with you, I feel disgusted with myself for sleeping, and It has nothing to do with you, It could've been trey songz and I still would've felt the same way, Its just that..I had just broken up with Tyrell, 3 hours prior to us doing it. That's soooo fucked up. I haven't told him yet, because he's going through some stuff, but I am planning on telling him, please do not say anything. Anyways um, Im sorry If I hurt you, that wasn't the plan at all..I just need.. space.. yanno? We can be civil towards eachother, but just give me space.

 

Bye Keyon.

-Cheyenne D.