Willium Valen and The Curse of Hades

Chapter 11-I Forgot How Annoying You Were

In the morning it wasn't bright out, with no sunrise bleaching the sky until it faded into a soft blue, it was still gloomy and gray. The sky had a soft gray tone to it, it looked like it was early evening, but it was only morning. This place didn't have a sun, the only source of light was the moon, which made it very gray. I guess this was the brightest it could get out here, there was no limit to how dark it could get. Last night the moon and stars were all that could be seen. The cold air softly settled on my shoulders. I didn't sleep that well, it was very cold and Geo was muttering in his sleep. I wondered what he was dreaming about, he was muttering in French so I didn't know what he was saying or if he was saying anything at all. His voice was soft and quiet, though the pace of his words was fast, and seemed panicked. I wanted to wake up but I didn't want him to yell at me for waking him up, so I didn't. Willow was snoring loudly, she always snored, but she would never mutter in her sleep like Geo does. It was a windless night and it was cold outside, my clothes were still wet from when I was thrown into the pond. I was cold and wet, but my body didn't shiver. It felt frozen in the cold. The cold didn't have an icy chill to it, it was so hard to explain, it was like just seconds after jumping into cold water, you know it's cold, but the pain hasn't hit you yet. It was kinda nice. I couldn't stop thinking about the mindscape, sleeping on the floor just like this in the cold. I eventually fell asleep, curled up in a ball, and my hands clasped together on the ground of the tent. My mind constantly thought about the mindscape and what I could've done to save myself, to save my virginity, to save my dignity. I would always pine about it, it was like a leech or a parasite the way it was glued into my mind. I hated that I couldn't stop thinking about the mindscape and all of the other traumas I went through. I felt scared, more scared than I normally felt. If it was Zeus he could've been anywhere, he hadn't exactly given me up, maybe he was trying to get me back? It would make sense, Apollo would've known if Zeus put me back in the mindscape. Why were Willow and Geo kidnapped too? Maybe Zeus would actually kill me this time. What was so special about me? Why me? I found myself asking the same questions over and over knowing that I would never get an answer, never a logical one. I was scared that night. Every time the leaves would rustle I would flinch. Zeus had won, he made me paranoid, and he ruined me. He did all of those horrible things to me, now there was no way that I could ever heal. I tried not to breathe too loud so he wouldn't hear me, but Willow's snoring would've signaled him by now. I always hated it when it felt like his hands were on me, but it was worse when it felt like he was all over me again. I was always so confused, but too scared to say no to what he forced me to do. I always cried whenever he would do it, sometimes I would even pass out. It was always this hot and cold feeling when it came to remembering, I would either be mad or cry. When you've been sexually assaulted you know that nothing you could've done would've stopped them, but you can't stop your mind from wandering what you could've done differently to stop them. It wasn't my fault, it was all him, but...maybe just maybe, in another universe, maybe it didn't happen. I knew that the first step of healing was reaching out, but it was so hard. I tried to tell my parents once, but I started crying, and I couldn't even get a word out. I know what they would say, I've imagined it so many times. I imagined feeling better, feeling safe, not feeling bad. Sometimes I would think about blurting it out, but then I forget how to talk. The words would slip away from me, and leave me with nothing to say. I wanted to be happy but that seemed so impossible. Even if I was able to tell my parents, I'd have to talk about the details, they'd ask how many times it happened or why he did it, but I wouldn't know what to say. I can't even remember how many times he did it. I wanted all of the sadness and pain to stop, I wish that I could just forget everything that he did to me. I wish the aching and the throbbing of my body would just stop, all the scars, all the bruises, all the marks that danced across my skin, would just fade away. All reminders of him would be gone, I'd be happy, I wouldn't cry, I wouldn't stare at my scars for hours because they would all be gone. I'd be gone... Sometimes I get mad at myself for thinking like that, I just want to think of nothing but that's not possible. It's so frustrating how much pain my thoughts would put me through. I woke up in the morning and got off the ground. It looked like I was the last one to wake up. Good morning, Willow signed. "Good morning," I yawned. "Not screaming, yawning," I said to Willow's confused face. Willow nodded. Deaf people can't if someone is screaming or yawning because they both look the same to them. That's why I have to clarify it for Willow. Geo and Willium can you find some food? Willium you can have Geo check if it's poison, Willow signed. "Okay," I said. "What are we agreeing to?" Geo asked. "We need to find food," I sighed. "Yes," Geo softly scoffed. "No, we need to find food," I said, pointing at me and then at him. Geo and I walked through the forest, some of the trees had berries on them and other fruits. All of them were either blue or green. The more we walked, the lusher the forest seemed to get. I heard Geo sigh from behind me. "Tell me that you were a plant nerd," Geo said. "What?" I muttered. "Tell me that you were a plant nerd,""But I wasn't a plant nerd," I said. "We're going to die and it's all your fault," Geo sighed. "What!? It's not my fault-" "Uh, yes it is. You're a bad omen," Geo said. "Well didn't the camp teach you about this stuff?" I scoffed. "Camp Mulberry is a paganism camp, the only thing I learned about plants is which ones to use in spells and shit," Geo rolled his eyes. "It's a paganism camp?" I asked. "And a queer camp, a normal camp, an archery camp, a horse camp, and everything else. I mean do you think a camp that is run by the God of furries would be stable?" Geo scoffed. "So Muddles is a furry," I said. "Of course he is, well it's not confirmed but what else could he be?" Geo muttered. "I knew it," "That's not even the weirdest thing about him," Geo sighed. "There are weirder things?" I scoffed. "You know all of the cats that roam around camp, they're his, as in his biological kids," Geo said. "Uh...why would you tell me that?" I exclaimed. "Because you asked," Geo scoffed. "No, I didn't, not for that!" I said. Geo picked a berry. "Try it," "No, you're older," I said. "We're the same age," Geo scoffed. "I should be 22 since I was born in 1123," I muttered."That means you're older!" Geo scoffed."Well, I'm a blessing demigod, I wouldn't be able to bounce back from that," I sighed."So am I," Geo muttered."Well, you also have a biological Goddess parent, you don't need two, you're cheating," I said."Cheating, nah, that would be my ex, eat it," Geo scoffed. "Well, I don't trust you," I muttered. "Damn, you're good," Geo said, smirking at me. Geo ate the berry. "Geo!" I exclaimed. "It's a blueberry," Geo scoffed. "Oh," I mustered, I felt those stupid little butterflies flutter again. Why did Geo look at me like that? I was a mess around him when he acted like that, I completely forgot how to function. I thought that the next time I saw Geo the fluttering feeling wouldn't be so bad, it would be like how it was in my dreams, but it was stronger. Stronger than I could've ever imagined. It felt like there was a big balloon in my chest, the feeling was thick and strong. The balloon was filled with those stupid little butterflies. I couldn't decide if I liked the feeling or not. We gathered up the blueberries in the little basket that Willow gave us. "Is this all we're eating?" I asked. "Who knows," Geo scoffed.