twin souls. (Not done editing.)

29.Reading joels diary.

Hunters POV

Julian is asleep in my bed at my parents house I didn't have the energy to travel all the way back neither did Julian so we just crashed at my parents not that I cared here is where j felt the safest.
I look at the little black diary next to me I wanted to read it so I decided this was the time.
I open it and it stand with his writing.

Joel Ryder's diary.

I flip the pages and he's already started writing.
~•~
So ever since my dad left me and my mom my mom has made me go to a therapist...
Nothing was really working for the therapist but he says I'm in denial and depressed.
So he's forcing me to write a journal.
I don't see the point in this shit but he said it would help me.
So I'm doing it.
~•~
So that's the reason why he has journal.
I flip the pages.
~•~
Tell me I'm beautiful she said but I didn't.
She wasn't beautiful.
Her blond hair and pink lipstick and fake eyelashes....
She wasn't beautiful she was fake.
"Joel why won't you tell me I'm beautiful?"
She asked me her hands on her hips now so I said it.
"Eve you aren't beautiful your just fake.."
She flipped at me broke bunch of shit and called me names I didn't care..
She wasn't beautiful never was and never will..
Who would ever love someone as fake as her? Sure as hell won't be me..
We had nice sex and that was it.. Nothing more or nothing less.
~•~
I cringe as reading about Eve she sure as hell was crazy.
~•~
Her beautiful brown hair covered her boobs she was only wearing white t-shirt which was now see trough her brown eyes look up to mine and I smiled at her.
She was beautiful we were both wet but I didn't care.
I didn't care we were currently in a lake or that she was my best friends two sister.
She was so beautiful so I pulled her closer to me and kissed her.
Did I regret it?
Not at all..
~•~
I smile I remember that night so well..
I really though I was beautiful.
~•~
Oliver just hit me and had this huge speech
'She's my sister I love her if you hurt her I'll kill you with my own bare hands!'
And on and on
They two would never admit it to each other but they really cared about each other I sometimes got Jealous of their relationship I wished I had any sibling on my own that I could bug and have hate/love relationship with
~•~
I smile I never knew Oliver did that.
~•~
I think I love her.
The way she laugh makes me smile and even just being in her presents makes me smile and whenever I'm alone I feel like I've lost control all over again.
She brings me back to life.
Ollie says he's never seen her smile as much as when she's with me.
I think I'm madly in love with Hunter Hope stone.
~•~
I feel tears leaking down my face as I read the last sentence.
Damn.
~•~
I screwed it.
Eve came over today total surprise and i had just smoked a joint she started to strip infront of me and I was so confused and then she attacked my lips and started to undress me.
I tried to push her away but j was to weak after smoking the pot..
Then I hear something break and Eve pulls away and I see hunter standing at the door bowl with freshly made cookies all over the floor..
She's crying silently.
I called at her but she turned away and ran.
After that everything went back to hell.
Everybody knew what happened but they thought I had cheated on hunter but Eve attacked me!
Oliver hates me and even the guys and the team they think I've gone the absolute low cheating on the captains twin sister but I wouldn't cheat on hunter I love her! But no one will believe me! No one..
~•~
My eyes are widen and I feel angry very angry!! Eve sexually abused him and made it look like he cheated on me!! That fucking bitch! She ducking ruined everything!
I'll kill her.
I keep reading the diary until I get to the last page he wrote.
~•~
First dad left.
Then hunter.
Then Oliver.
Then the team.
Then all my friends..
I'm left all alone.
Mom doesn't come home now she just works and works.
High school is over every body has started their new life except me.
I'm giving up.
I can't do anymore of this.
I'm not loved I'm weak and everyday is worse then the day before.
I've tried to get better I've tried to be I can't anymore.
I can't even look at myself in the mirror anymore without feeling of disgusts.
My wrists are all scarred now and my hair is too long.
I'm a failure and I deserve today.
I'm sorry mom you didn't deserve this shit.
I'm sorry that I left you to.
I'm sorry I couldn't be strong enough for the two of us.
I'm sorry.
When you find this journal give hunter it.
She needs to find out the truth.
~•~
My eyes are watery as I flip the page.
~•~
Hunter of your reading this I'm sorry for causing you pain I never attended to.
I truly did love you with all of my heart and soul.
I'm sorry that I broke your heart and trust I'm sorry for being a shitty boyfriend and I'm sorry for everything.
I never stopped loving you and I never will.
~•~
I'm shaking I'm crying so much.
He made a fucking Suicide!
He killed him self.
The second Person I loved had died by their own hands!
"Hey hunter it's okay! Hush I'm here in not leaving"
I hear Julian's tired voice beside me say tiredly pulling me in his arms.
"H-he ki-ki-killed hi-him s-s-self!"
I stutter and he just keep hushing his hand stroking my hair and the other around me holding me close to him.
"He-he d-didn't che-chea-cheat on me"
I murmur.
And Julian strokes a tear away from my cheek and kisses my forehead.
"I love you hunter I'm here for you I won't leave you I promise you! And I'm so sorry for you loss I knew you loved him and he loved you but sometimes people just can't handle more life like my brother he didn't handle living anymore so he took his own life. Sometimes they don't see anything better than that and I'm so sorry you had to go trough that!"
I see his eyes are about to water as he talks about his brother so I lean in and kiss him.