home (Kiss Of Life x Male Y/N)

chapter 11 - did you miss them?

I continued on reading while Suze was on her way back to her place to grab her stuff.

Too focused on the book, I had reassured myself that it was all going to be okay.

Too worried about how much she's changed in a short amount of time, but am I just scared of change or am I scared of myself accepting the new fondness in it?

Putting my feet on the coffee table, the day was gonna come to an end as the sunset had started.

The orange-yellow shine came through from my window as it visibly showed its presence on the tips of my toes, illuminating my kitchen and parts of my front door and living room.

Y/N - huh. Pretty.

Talking to myself in just words made me feel like I wasn't alone but it was all just me. I might be a little manic but it made me feel safe.

Safe.

Growing up the way I was, I always felt safe but yet not.

Maybe because I felt alienated, being the person I was, the family I resided in, not everywhere took a liking to how I was, especially in the country I lived in most of my life till now.

I won't stray away from my original intent, I won't.

I'm still me at the end of the day, I won't lose my self identity but I need to be better than this.

I need to learn that things need to happen, that they help me grow.

Suze.

Maybe I was all over my head over her. But I know how I feel.

These emotions.

The tightness in my chest when I see her, I understand it.

Although I feel the same towards the girls. Nat, Jules, Belle but not Haneul.

It's different.

It's different with you Suze.

God damn it.

Maybe I'm just contradicting myself.

I'm over my head again.

I got suddenly ripped out of my head as my phone rang on the coffee table.

It vibrates violently, causing me to throw my book to the side and sat up suddenly to grab it off the table and answered it

Y/N - Yeoboseyo?

Belle - Y/N?

Y/N - hey Belle, what brings you to me?

Belle - I'm gonna be home in a bit and uh- mind if I come over?

Y/N - sure of course, I don't mind some company. Though Suze had just came back from Spain and she's out right now

Belle - ah that's fine, I just wanted to go see you anyways

Y/N - oh cool, don't mind me asking but why are you coming to see me right now? Aren't you girls busy?

Belle - oh we are, I'm just finished for the day, I'm heading home first but they'll be home in a few hours

Y.N - okay okay, see you then?

Belle - see you then.

I hung up the phone and put it back on the coffee table.

Sighing to myself, I looked at my book and grabbed it

Y/N - next time bud

I got up, holding my knees and then walked over to my bookshelf and put it away, I sat my sights on the kitchen