damnation - r.j.lupin

promising the impossible

The 2nd Law : Isolated System - muse 

☆☾

Everyone was seated around the round table for a new meeting. Dumbledor had just taken stock of the latest information. Umbridge, the Ministry and Harry Potter are discussed. Olivia growls angrily at her chair. The subject of Mona has not yet been broached. Her legs jump nervously under the table.

Suddenly, she feels a hand on her thigh and she stops. Remus was sitting to her right and he gripped her thigh tightly before letting go, preventing her leg from jumping. She swallows hard trying to chase away the shivers running through her body and the calming effect he has on her.

Dumbledor gets up a few minutes later, announcing the end of the meeting. Olivia jumped out of her chair. "Wait! We haven't talked about Mona yet."

Everyone exchanges a look. "Miss Marat, the question of Miss Vaxey has not yet been decided."

Her gaze darkens and she places her hands on the wooden table. "It's been three months. You promised me you'd bring her back here with Diane, safe."

Olivia feels Remus stand up behind her.

"I'm afraid we need more information to be sure-"

"You promised. If you're not going to bring her back here, I'm leaving. That was the condition."

"I have to go, but we-"

Olivia doesn't listen to the end of Dumbledor's sentence and storms out of the room towards the corridor that leads to the front door. Remus runs after her and finally catches up with her, her hand already on the handle.

He grabs her shoulders and pins her against the wall. Olivia can't tell what's inside his eyes. Despair ? Anger ? Worry, perhaps?

"You can't leave."

"Why? Everyone promised me to-"

"Because I- We need you here". He poses, as if he was trying to regain composure, unsure of what to say. "You are in possession of secret information now and going home is too dangerous."

Remus's heart skips a beat when he sees tears filling her eyes. A drop travels down her cheek to land on her lip. With his finger, he traces the travel of the tear and caresses her lip with his thumb.

"I'll try to do something for Mona, I promise."

His hand still against her cheek, Olivia lets herself go for a few seconds and presses her head against his hand. She would like to throw herself into his arms. But she sniffles, sits up, and removes Remus' hand.

"Don't promise me anything impossible," are the last words she says, looking him straight in the eyes before taking the stairs two at a time.

Her words hit him like a slap. Like they were made for him. They instantly brought him back to their times at Hogwarts when he cowardly pushed her away. Remus hears the door slam upstairs and sighs before going back into the meeting room.

Night had already fallen and only the street lamps lit the sad room. Lying on her bed, her head turned towards the window, Olivia cannot bring herself to close her eyes. Mona's head, the dark mark and Diane's still innocent look cannot leave her thoughts.

Once again, she feels used, lied to. The condition of her admission into the Order and the sharing of information was precisely to be able to bring Mona and Diane to safety, she made it clear to everyone. And yet, on this October night, Olivia finds herself even more alone than before without news of the girls.