The Fall

176. You felt that too?

DECEMBER 24, 2019 — AVENGERS COMPOUND — RÉA

"So, you said you'd tell me why Steve looked ponderous," I say to Bucky.

Dinner is over, and all of us are scattered between the kitchen and the lounge. Clint and Scott are in two of the armchairs, already snoozing; Pepper and Laura are on one of the love seats, talking about babies; Rhodey and Happy are playing chess; Thor, Loki, Wanda, and Vision are entertaining Cooper, Lila, Nathaniel, and Adam with stories and the occasional magickal display; Sam, Nat, Bruce, Tony, Caroline, and Steve are at the kitchen table; Bucky and I are on the other love seat.

"I will. Can we do that whole telepathic conversation thing though?" he replies.

I nod, and form the link.

"I'm assuming you don't want anyone to hear—including Steve—so now I'm even more curious," I say.

"Steve and I were talking earlier. And he didn't pick up on a detail, which is very unusual for him."

"Yeah...he has 'a mind like a steel trap and is sharp as a tack', as Tony puts it."

"Exactly. So anyway, he missed this detail, and it was pretty obvious, so I asked if he was okay. He admitted that he was distracted because of Caroline. He said that when he saw her on Halloween that, and I quote, 'it's like the feeling when you have a word on the tip of your tongue but for some reason your mind just suddenly goes blank and you forget the word'."

I gasp.

"You okay?" Bucky asks.

"Yeah. I...I have an idea why he feels like that. But I don't want to say anything in case I'm wrong." I pause. "Actually, never mind. I'll tell you."

I pause again. "I invited Caroline and Adam to join us because I just had the feeling that I should. And when she told me about their family—that they have none—I thought that was why." I pause again. "Now I'm not so sure."

"What's your idea?"

"I, um...I've felt that way before."

I let out a small sigh, and glance over at Steve and Caroline before looking back at Bucky.

"The first time was when I saw your picture. In your Army file. When I saw it, two things happened simultaneously: I realised what you were—are—incredibly handsome...and I also was hit with this feeling like I was forgetting something but couldn't figure out what. I thought it was odd, but I brushed it off. And then it would randomly crop up...it's actually part of why I looked into veteran-specific charities to donate to for poker night. The night before I met you, when I was stargazing on my balcony, was one of those times. I saw the constellation Hydra, which made me think of HYDRA, which made me think of you...." I trail off. "And then we locked eyes in Wakanda, and I felt it, along with this...magnetic pull."

"You felt that too?"

"I did...wait...'too'? You felt it?"

"I did."

I smile softly.

"Well, I didn't know what it was at the time, but I eventually figured it out. It's the soulmate connection...bond...whichever you prefer to call it."

"So you think that Steve and Caroline might—"

"Maybe? I don't know for certain. It's...I...I still don't know what powers I do and don't have since I came back. I don't have a handbook or a checklist; a lot of them, I end up discovering in the moment." I pause. "I can see them. The bonds, I mean. It's not really a thread, like some proverbs talk about...though that is a good analogy. But soulmate's auras tend to match. Not just the colour—because plenty of people share the same or similarly-coloured auras—but also the frequency. It's...it's almost like breathing the same breath? I don't know if that makes sense. I'm honestly not quite sure how to explain it. Anyway, I can see them, and Steve's and Caroline's seem to match...sometimes. Hers is constant; his kind of...disappears? It's difficult to get a read on. Of course, that's Steve in a nutshell, so I shouldn't be surprised."