~𝕀𝕥 𝕊𝕥𝕒𝕣𝕥𝕖𝕕 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙 ℕ𝕠𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘~ S. G 𓃗

part 15| clean up and ease dropping

Keep coming back...

We ate, we talked. We did, I don't know. Normal human things? But I wasn't just doing all that.. I was doing something else

Thinking of Sam. I just couldn't stop, it's like an obsession and I feel terrible about it. Eventually Colby got the check and we left after cleaning up the table a bit to help the staff. I always try to do that, I just feel bad for them because they work super hard and then all the tables are so extremely messy and it's just hard for them.

So I always clean it up for them!

- at the house -

As soon as we walked through the door I sat my purse down and almost immediately ran up to my room. It seemed random, I'm sure Sam and Colby were confused. But there was a reason why. Have you ever felt overwhelmed by your own thoughts? Because that's how I feel. GOSH WHO AM I EVEN TALKING TO?? MYSELF. JEEZ I'M DRIVING MY SELF INSANE. UGHH. I scream at myself in my mind. All these thoughts and feelings really are driving me insane. I don't think I'll ever get over him. "Him" being Sam, of course.

I plop on my bed and grab a pillow, place it below my face, smash my face into it, and SCREAM. I screamed as hard as I could into that pillow. I could even cry. Not being able to be with him romantically hurt almost. Well, not almost, it did. Ive never felt this way to someone so heavily before. It sucks if I'm being honest.

The time reads 12:38
It's not super late, so I don't really care. I am super tired though. I find the courage to pull myself out of bed and I go down stairs, but before I reached the bottom I heard Colby talking to himself. I was gonna scare him but he seemed like it was serious, you know what I mean? So I hid behind an area of the wall covering the stairs and I listened in. I don't particularly like ease dropping but I guess I just wanted to know?

"GODDAMNIT" I hear him whisper scream to himself. He bit at his knuckle, something people do when they're nervous. I was gonna stop there but I felt like I had to listen in.

"I can't!! Why do I do this to myself.. I can't like her.. If I like her, I hurt Sam. GOD DAMNIT OH MY GOD" I wondered who he was talking about. I mean, it surely wasn't me.. Right?

No no, it can't be! I'm sure of it..

|•°•°•COLBYS POV•°•°•|
I can't like her. I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T!
Jesus I feel like a child. I thought to myself, biting my knuckle in a nervous fit.

I looked over and could've sworn I saw her, peeking around the wall at the top of the stairs.
I convinced myself it was just my imagination. Eventually I stopped worrying and figured I'd just make myself stop liking her. Yeah! That'll work.. Surely..!

I hope...

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Word count: 517
Short chapter IK but I'm starting a WHOLE other book rn and I wanna work on it so, yk yea lol
Hope y'all are still following along ! Ik it's not the best but, it's better than the first book I wrote! So, slay ig lol😭