There's a Thin Line Between Love and Hate

There's a Thin Line Between Love and Hate (19)

When I got back to the cabin, AJ had actually stopped crying, which was kind of a shock. I thought she was never going to stop... Was that how it felt being heartbroken? I didn't really know what heartbreak was, even though I had only experienced a little when it had come to Dallas. But I was only fourteen back then, so I couldn't have really been in love with him... I just thought I was.

I was really expecting to see that AJ was still crying. Truthfully, I was kind of hoping that she still would be so I wouldn't have been the only one. I had just gotten so used to her tear-streaked face that I almost forgot what she actually looked like...

"Jordan!" Lexi cried when she saw that I was now the one with tears in my eyes and a red face that made it look like I had been slapped fifty thousand times. Yeah, I was sure that that was definitely attractive. "What happen? Did something happen with Dallas?"

Except for the fact that he totally ditched me when I needed him the most, Dallas hadn't done anything at all. Part of me wished that we had gotten into a fight or something if it meant that my grandmother would still be alive. But I knew that that was impossible and could never happen. Dallas had left me before I broke down, not even realizing that I needed his help...

"No," I excused, shaking my head and wiping a tear from my eye. It was the truth, even though it definitely didn't seem like it would be a lie. "I just got a call from my mom... My grandma passed away this morning."

All the girls in the cabin's faces softened. All I did was plop down on my bed and onto my stomach, not in the mood for any interaction right then. After what happened with Jesse... That was enough interaction for the day. Maybe the whole week... Or the month.

I felt so strange after what had happened with Jesse. Now when I thought of him, I didn't cringe in disgust. And I didn't understand it. He was there for me when I needed him, and I owed him for that. I owed him for being a friend and not making fun of me at my most vulnerable time.

He had comforted me, and yet Dallas didn't. Dallas was the closest thing I had to a boyfriend, but he left me. Jesse was my enemy, but he sat out on the dock and let me cry into his chest for two hours while he rocked me back and forth. Jesse was there. Dallas wasn't.

"I'm sorry, Jordan," Lexi apologized, even though she didn't even have to. She sat down next to me, rubbing my shoulder softly. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No," I answered into my pillow miserably. "I just want to lie here and wait until I slowly decompose."

"Is she always like this when she's upset?" Molly asked, crinkling her nose at my decomposing comment. "Because that's kind of gross... and depressing."

"Her grandma was the closest person to her, Molly," Chelsea sighed, coming over and sitting down next to Lexi and patting the back of my leg. "Jordan, don't be too sad. Your grandma's in a better place now."

And that only caused me to start wailing once again. I didn't want to be reminded of her; I just wanted to sleep until it all felt like a dream. But right then, it did feel like a dream. But it seemed more like a nightmare that I could never get out of.

I knew that my grandma was in a better place. At least, that's what I believed. I was sure my grandma was in heaven with my grandpa, happier now. She hadn't ever really been the same since he had died. But now she was with him again...

But that didn't make me feel any better. I wanted her here with me.

I wasn't about to tell my friends about Jesse comforting me. I was sure that they would no longer be sympathetic if they knew I was comforted by the enemy. But he was the only one there when I needed someone the most... Not Dallas.