Afraid to Love

Chapter 21

Jenna's POV

I am just as utterly shocked as Harry by my choice of words but I don't stop to think about them before I crash my lips to his and I reach to unbuckle his belt.

I yank it off and Harry quickly takes off his pants before tugging at mine, grabbing my lacy navy blue underwear with them and un clutches my bra.

His lips push into mine and he lays onto of me, my legs wrapped around him, one of his arms gripping my thigh.

I take the moment to appreciate the fact that Harry is an amazing kisser. Nothing is a bigger turn off then when a guy has a wet, loud, awkward kiss (like Calum did). Harry's kiss was ever so sweet, so much passion and lust came from the way his soft lips moved with mine and his ever so sweet tongue traced mine.

I reach my hand over to his nightstand and bang on him letting him know to grab a condom and he doesn't hesitate and puts one on.

I watch him put in on and I begin to question if I'm really ready for this, I've only had sex once with Calum and it hurt so much, not only because it was my first time, but the aftermath of everything that happened. Would I regret sleeping with Harry? Would he ever throw our intimacy in my face? We did just start dating..

Harry stops my thinking by kissing me and pushing his large fingers inside me and pumping in and out in a slow and teasing way. I moan at his touch as he circles his fingers inside of me adding to the pleasure.

"You like that?" He says and all I can say is "mhmm" and he smiles from my pleasure. He quickens his pace slightly and my craving for more grows.

"I need.." I trail off enjoying the way he's touching me too much to speak.

"You need what baby" he says in his dark seducing voice, breathing hot air on my neck.

"I need all of you" I say with a moan and he withdraws his fingers from me.

"You're ready right?"

"Completely" I say and he pushes his length into me and I wince and he panics.

"Am I hurting you!?" He asks and begins pulling away but I wrap my legs around him and pull him back into me.

"Not at all its good.. so good baby" I say and he calms.

He begins thrusting in and out of me and we both begin sweating and our breathing turns unsteady. Harry try's too keep a slower pace but it quickens as time goes on.

He feels so good inside me this way, I will admit at first it was slightly uncomfortable but now it's nothing but the purest of pleasure, something I hadn't even known existed. I feel a build up inside me, craving for Harry to push me over the edge, and I can tell he feels it too as he quicken his pace and pushed deeper into me and we let out a moan.

"Your so huge Harry" I say in the moment and despite my horrible 'dirty talk' Harry groans at my words. The sound alone is pushing me to my peek. "I'm so close Harry" I say and grip his shoulders as he thrusts into me all the way this time and he spills into the condom, the feeling alone pushes me over the edge and I join him.

We lay for a couple moments trying to take control of our breathing until Harry pulls out and throws out the condom and lays next to me.

Harry is smiling so big and his dimple is perking through, "what" I giggle and push his shoulder. He moves my hair away from my face. "That was just-" "amazing" we both and and then laugh at our giddiness. "You are just so perfect, thank you for giving me a chance" he says and the guilt floods over me and drops to the pit of my stomach.

In the most fucked up way a part of me feels like me sleeping with him has given him the upper hand, he now has control, he could do so many things with it. Manipulate me, tell people rumours, he has the power over me to do what he pleases now that I've given him that part of me and although I trust him I can't help but feel this burst of worry that he will do to me what's been done before.

I hide my worries with a smile and Harry turns on The Big Bang Theory as I lay naked in his arms.

I hold onto this lovely man and try to convince myself that he's different, his feelings are genuine and he will not do me wrong.

'His feelings are genuine and he will not do me wrong, his feelings are genuine and he will not do me wrong' I say to myself over and over in my head before dosing off in his muscular arms.
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Shorter chapter but I hope you liked it, feel free to give me your thoughts!
Xo