Howl Silently My Love

Instinct

Chapter 9

The bright light shining in from my window woke me the next morning. I looked around slowly before getting up, as if I expected something to happen but ofcourse nothing did. I sighed as I rolled unto my belly and looked over at Ryder; he was still sleeping. That wasn't much of a surprize though when you considered the fact that he didn't come home until around midnight. That only made me sigh again. Everything was so messed up. Ryder finally found a mate but what difference did that make now. We had like a month before our demise. What was the point in bothering anymore?

"Ryder?" I called in  afrail voice. I guess I hadn't recoveried from my all night crying session. He shifted, stretched then turned to me. I could tell that I was bothering him but I really wanted to talk to him. After taking a good look at he became fully awake as he stared on intently. "I-Is that Teri girl a nice person? You know, even though she's from the Cerulean Mist." He continued staring at me. I guess he was looking for the right answer.

"Well, she's still unsure about the whole thing, but she's willing to try seeing as how it must be the truth and uh she hasn't growled at me yet so I guess she's fine."

I nodded, numbness was starting to set in.

"Are you alright . . .?"

I nodded again, "Um yeah . . .I'm fine. . ." I lied. Inside I felt like I was going mad. For some reason I felt unnerved.

"Maia, you weren't fine when last night when I got in last night and you obviously aren't fine now. What happened?"

"It's nothing," I said trying to make my tone light, "I guess I really was just sleeping with the enemy. It just took me too long to realize that." He tilted his head to the side waiting for an explanation. "He wants us dead, he already has a plan and it's the harvest moon." Ryder shot up.

"What?!"

I sighed. "They know the effect it has on us and they plan to use it to their advantage. We have about a month but that's it." I got up, willing myself to not think about it anymore. "But that's fine because we can do so much in a month and if we start now we should---"

"My God you actually sound as if you plan to die!" Ryder exclaimed.

"Well what other fate is there?! They have a whole pack, we have two people and of the two only one can fight! Ryder it's so obvious that it hurts but I'm not going to think about it too much because I know how I'm going to end my life and it's going to be with a bang. I don't have any fight in me. I'm probably the worst werewolf or she-wolf or whatever it is the world has ever had. Do you think I'm like you, jumping blindly into danger knowing fully well what will happen to me---well I'm not!"

"Oh stop pitying yourself it's disgusting to watch! You don't get to quit on me okay, you are going to fight right alongside me whenever they attack and you know what? We're going to win. You may plan to die and that's fine, kill yourself after the victory but don't you dare count us out before time. You owe me your all. On the night those bastards attacked us, they left me to protect you and I pulled your ass through half a mile of nothing but forest okay, I could have just given up and said 'oh they're going to kill us anyway' but I didn't so you don't get to either. We are in this thing together."

"Ryder---"

"I'm not interested. Get your act together." He said coldly before jumping off the bed and heading out the door. I screamed and threw my pillow at the door but it hit the wall. He couldn't expect me to fight. I didn't know how to.

Looking through the window I saw him disappear into the forest. Where could he possibly be going? He never left the house this early, come to think of it he wouldn't normally have been awake. I wasn't willing to follow though. Wherever he was going he obviously knew what he was doing and besides I would have been no help to him because from the night Nala turned me into a wolf I couldn't for the life of me figure out how to do it again. There must have been some secret that I just wasn't getting. Or maybe it was one of those things that are so simply that they're are hard to understand. Either way I wasn't getting it. Yet all the others made it look so easy.