Stuck on Replay

Chapter 4

After band practice, I walked back home alone. Luckily, it wasn't daylight savings, yet, so it was still light.

As I neared the house, again, I found myself in the same situation as last week. I was closer to the house, about to walk on the walkway, before I heard yelling and shouting. I stood still on the sidewalk, feet frozen to the concrete. I wanted to move, but my brain had a delay in contacting any of my limbs.

I was one of Dad's favorite people to yell at, so I wasn't at home much to avoid it.

"I'M GOING OUT. AND WHEN I GET BACK, YOU BETTER STOP CRYING!" I heard my dad yell. More sobs from inside. "OH SHUT UP YOU BIG BABY! YOU'RE TEN YEARS OLD!"

"That doesn't mean she can't cry!" I heard my mom exclaim, and a slap was heard.

Footsteps became louder and louder, and I started to see my dad's silhouette. My eyes widened and my feet unfroze from the pavement. Think fast. Think fast. The words raced through my mind.

Somehow, I managed to dive into the bushes next to our house. My dad couldn't see me, but I could see him as clear as day.

As soon as he was clear from the block, I jumped up, climbed up on the porch from the railing, and snuck inside.

In the hall, shards of a once beautiful vase was scattered all over the floor with flower petals drifting slowly down to the broken vase. Adam had a deep cut in his forearm, and tired eyes. Clara was sobbing, and her knees were up to her chest. As she sat on the floor. I couldn't see her face, but I could hear the muffled cries easily. Mom was clutching her left cheek, and I could tell that there was a mark of my dad's palm that would eventually fade away, but would leave a bruise.

Rachel and the twins were nowhere in sight. They had probably followed the plan, or tried to, but Dad got to Clara first.

"Mom? What..." The words were stuck in my throat and I felt like it was my fault for not coming home. Then Dad would beat me, not Clara.

"Your... Sweetie..." Mom choked out, then burst into tears. Rachel and the twins appeared and the twins started crying too. Rachel and I exchanged worried looks.

"Same routine as last Friday." Rachel ordered. "Come on, Mom, let's get you to your room."

Rachel led Mom away with heavy shoulders, Mom's sobs slowly fading as they walked away.

I picked up Clara, my backpack, then carried her out to the back porch.

Adam led the twins up to the attic, both hand in hand with Adam.

"I'm sorry Dad hurt you." I hugged Clara before setting her down on the porch swing. "I could have helped if I wasn't with my friends."

"It's okay Mel." She smiled a little bit through her tears. "You were happy there, and you aren't here."

"But I am happy here." I protested.

"No you aren't. You like school because you're safe there."

"Not exactly, Clara. You see, there's a lot of people who are like Dad out in the world, and I'm unfortunate to know some of them."

"Oh." She replied quietly. "Will I meet those people when I'm older?"

"Yes. There are few people who do good in the world." I nodded. "You may happen to be one of them."

"Why are mean people more powerful in the world?"

"Because the others live in constant fear. Only those who are courageous enough will stand up to them. There is an unequal balance in the world of good and evil. Maybe one day, you'll help balance it." I grinned.

"But can't I do it now?" Her tears had dried and she looked up at me, smiling.

"You can start by being kind and not complaining about anything. That'll get you somewhere. It's still okay to cry though."

"Did Daddy really mean it when he said I was a big baby?" She asked, smile fading, and tears appearing in her eyes.

"I bet he didn't but it was something to get his anger out. I know that Dad used to love us, and maybe still does."

"Does daddy hate us?"

"No. He's angry a lot, but not at us." I lied quietly. "You're ten years old, don't worry about that kind of stuff right now, okay?"

"Okay."

"I know you're a little old for this, but why don't we make some fairy houses?" I suggested.

Her face lit up. Fairy houses were a bit childish for her age, but it used to be her favorite thing to do... before Dad's abuse started. Moss made a perfect roof, and little stones and sticks did the trick for walls. We could create fairies made out of twine, but the fairy houses were usually too small for the twine fairies to fit in.

We spent the afternoon in the backyard, just the two of us. It was easy to forget about Dad, and just spend some time together, which, we hadn't done in a very long time.

Dinner was Chinese take-out (we had swept the hall clean of the vase shards) and dessert was fortune cookies.

After dinner, the kids were sent up to bed, and we had another family meeting.

"Okay, this is getting out of control, we need a better way to keep the kids safe." Rachel slammed a cup of water on the kitchen table, and part of the water spilled onto the table. "Mom's always falling apart, we're having to be the grown ups here... I mean, I'm a grown up, but I'm your sister, not Mom!"

"Boy am I glad that you aren't drinking yet." Adam said, and we stared at him hopelessly. "What?"

I rolled my eyes. Mom wiped her eyes and didn't bother to run to the bathroom to fix her mascara that was running down her face. I mentally reminded myself to get her waterproof makeup at some point.

"We should move away tonight." Adam suggested.

"No." Mom shot down the idea immediately. "You know what he said he'd do if we left town without so much as a goodbye or a warning."

"We should report him." Rachel said.

"You know what would happen if we did." Mom replied stubbornly.

"The twins and Clara and Melody should run away." Adam suggested.

"What? No! I'm not letting them run off, they need their mother." Mom shook her head. "Go to bed, I'll think of something in the morning."

The three of us sighed, but knew Mom was beyond convincing at this point.

I didn't want to talk to anyone about it that night. Not even Rachel. It was too late to call any of my friends, and calling them would mean telling them about what Dad does.

Maybe I was meant to be weak from Dad's abuse and grow stronger as I grew older. Just a thought.