Obviously

Chapter 10

There is one more week until December starts and honestly Louis can't wait. Literally he can't wait anymore that he is already putting up his Christmas tree.

He called Lottie and asked her to come help him earlier but she said she was going to the mall with her fiends so he called Harry who didn't answer. Louis isn't going to let that bother him and since he has no one else he's going to do it himself.

He goes into his closet and drags his Christmas boxes into his living room. He opens the first box and puts his hand in to find out that it's his Christmas tree, which he can't build by himself. He goes to the next box and puts his hand in to find out that it's the lights and small items that he would set around his house, which he also can't do. The last and smallest box is full of the ornaments for the tree.

Louis sighs and throws himself to the ground of course he can't do shit. He's so fucking useless that it's not even funny. How is he expected to do anything if he can't even set up his own Christmas decorations? He failed his editors' test yesterday and he studied so hard for it. And the worst part is when his professor called him into his office and told him to look for a more suitable major because he won't become an editor with his situation. He called it a situation because he's too heartless to just say that Louis is a blind freak that is going nowhere in life.

Louis doesn't even know he's crying until he finds himself curled into a ball lying on his side in front of the boxes. He doesn't even know what he should do with his life anymore. He has been told before so many times that he can't do anything when he's blind and he's always wanted to prove those people wrong but he never will. Many of his old therapists used to tell him he should get a trained dog or a simple helper he said no because that will just made him feel even more useless than he already is.

Louis has never felt suicidal before but right now he sees no reason to live.

He curls himself more into his ball, if possible, and cries loudly. He doesn't care if the whole apartment building-the whole London can hear because everyone should feel his pain. Even though no matter how much pain he is feeling now nothing will be as horrible as how he become blind.

Thinking about the day just makes Louis shiver. He swore to himself he would never go back to Doncaster and even if his family begs him he won't take one more step into it.

That horrible day killed all his hopes of being normal. It killed all his feelings of possible love or being loved by someone else. It killed his eyes and worst of all it killed him. If he could go back to that day he'd never leave his house he would've stayed in bed sleeping all day. But of course it's way too late now.

"Louis!?" A muffled shout comes from outside his front door. It's Harry, of course it's Harry! Louis sobs louder and Harry starts banging on the door panicked. "Louis babe! Open the door!" Louis shakes his head even though Harry can't see him. "Louis I need you to open the door." Harry says clammier now but Louis can still detect the panic in his voice.

"I-I can't." Louis says and he knows Harry can't hear him but he says it anyways. "I can't so anything!" He shouts. "Everything I do ends badly!" He cries out. He can hear the rain falling outside and when he opens his eyes all he sees is darkness and he's brought back to the horrible day he lost his eyes.

"Louis!?" The cries inside the flat have stopped and Harry panics from the other side of the door. Louis doesn't reply so Harry takes two steps back and throws his body against the door.

"No! No! Please stop!" Louis shouts from the other side and Harry can sense that isn't towards him.

"Louis!? Are you okay? What's going on babe?" He throws his body against the door again and Louis let out a piercing scream and Harry uses everything he has and breaks open the door. He runs through the broken door into the house and towards Louis' shouts.