the most beloved | patrochilles au | boyxboy

the truce erupts in war

la devotee - panic! at the disco

m e n e l a u s
" even a fool learns something once it hits him "

"I get it, you think she's hot! But you can't just say 'Oh hey, let's take someone else's girlfriend and fuck her!'"

Achilles sipped his hot coffee, walking into the cafeteria, Patroclus by his side. They'd seen this kind of stuff before: boys overprotective of their girlfriends, cheerleaders fighting over football players, the students who wanted to physically attack their teachers for giving them bad grades. But Menelaus was furious.

He was squaring Paris up, and Paris looked terrified. Menelaus was bigger than him, had a deeper voice than him, and he for some reason thought a neck tattoo would be a good idea over the summer. Paris was beautiful, sure, but Menelaus could snap you in half if he wasn't on your side. Paris wasn't on Menelaus' side.

"I - I just -" Paris stammered, trying to think of something clever to say. But that was hard when a tall ginger teenage boy is wanting to break your limbs.

"You what? Thought it'd be okay? We've been together for years!" Menelaus was seething now, and Achilles exhaled, whistling. Patroclus sighed, knowing Achilles really couldn't avoid drama to save his life.

"As lovely as Helen is and as you two are, where is this girl in debate? She's not here, yes Briseis I see you, but you're not Helen. So where's Helen? Because, we should probably take into account that she had consensual intercourse with Paris, correct? It was consensual, right?" Achilles turned to look at Paris. Paris nodded quickly, watching as Menelaus slowly backed up.

"You're an ass, you know what Achilles?"

"I prefer the term 'douchebag' as I've been called."

Menelaus rolled his eyes, crossing his arms. "So where's Helen?" He directed the question mainly at Briseis. Briseis raised an eyebrow.

"You're her boyfriend, big guy, call her maybe?"

The red head rolled his eyes again, this time at Briseis. He pulled out his phone, hitting a button and holding the phone up to his ear. The cafeteria waited in silence, except for the crunch of Diomedes' Apple chewing, to which Achilles gave him a glare.

"Hello? Yeah, Helen, uh, where are you? Why are you - okay, can you come down to the cafeteria? Yes I know school starts in ten minutes but - ugh fine, lunch then." He hung up the phone. "We're gonna continue this at lunch, pretty boy. You got saved this time."

Menelaus marched off, his white shirt stretching over his broad shoulders. Paris relaxed, slumping in his chair. Achilles looked at Paris. "You're screwed."

"Just because I try to stay out of drama doesn't -"

"Ah, I didn't have sex with another dude's girlfriend. Don't blame this on me. You dug your hole, have fun."

"Douchebag," Paris muttered under his breath as Achilles walked away.

"Thank you!"

Patroclus walked alongside Achilles as they exited the cafeteria, heading for their homeroom. "You really can't stay away from drama. You said we would this year!"