•Letters•

19.

Dear Luke,

It's been a while since I last wrote to you, how are you? What have you been up to?

I always seem to write about what I do and I never ask you what's been going on and that makes me feel guilty.

You'll never guess who I saw today, my sister. She called me first asked if we could meet up at the local coffee shop, I wasn't working and the kids needed to get out so I thought why not.

I was having a downer day and I was hoping she could cheer me up, the one thing I'm glad about is she didn't talk about mum and dad. I didn't want to hear about them and she seemed to understand that.

I wore a t-shirt out and my ripped jeans, I tried so hard to cover all my scars with my bracelets but she knew what I was trying to do. Seeing her helped me a lot.

She came back to the apartment with me the kids loved her and they played for hours, I took the chance to have a bath to try and relax. That didn't happen, it made me feel worse and I thank my sister for keeping my head above the water.

Luke, I tried to drown myself. That was until my sister came in to check on me and she pulled me up and that's when I lost it, the first time in ages since I have cried. Nothing helps me anymore, nothing makes me happy.

The kids are my life but some days I struggle, I struggle to pay my bills and keep food on the table for them. Hopefully in the next month Ash, Calum and Michael will have the music recording studio up and running. I was talking to them the other day and they said they have some local music artists lined up and ready to work with them.

I don't know much about what they're doing at the moment but I'm learning slowly. I go down there and Michael has been showing me a lot of the simple things before I learn the more complex stuff.

Music was always your passion and I remember you always telling me you were going to become famous with your music. I wanna live your dream, not so much becoming famous and playing to crowds but to be known for making music.

I wanna make you proud of me babe, I know you always were but I wanna do this for us, not just me and not you but for us and the kids.

I love you Luke, come home soon.

Jasmine xoxo

-

Heyy

So, you should go read heartbreak_hemmings Michael Clifford book and tell her to update

I know you love me Jas

Byee

~Jodie x