Leap of Faith

15. A Leap of Faith

The cold wind nipped at Kevin's face, making his nose and cheeks turn a rosey pink which helped mask his own blushing as Double D looked at him expectantly, almost analyzing him.

Kevin gulped, and looked down at his snow-dusted boots, listening intently to the crunching they made under him. It was quiet, really quiet, all around them, as the snow fell softly, blanketing the old playground in a white fluffy mantle, and as the warm yellow-orange glow of the street lamps illuminated them. Kevin was grateful for the privacy, but now, there was really nowhere left to run, nowhere to hide, and no one to help him.

"Dou-"

"Kev-"

Both boys began and shut up simultaneously. Kevin rubbed the back of his neck and Double D fixed his beanie.

'This is getting painfully awkward...' thought the redhead, "Y-you start."

"No, no, that's quite alright, you go first."

"Uhm...Yeah, okay." Kevin let out a slow shaky breath and spoke as clearly as he could. "Well, first of all, I just want to make it super clear that whatever you think might've happened back there," he pointed in the general direction back to Nazz's house, "it isn't true. Nothing happened. I swear to you, Edd, I never did anything."

Edd bit his lower lip in consideration for a moment, but then gave a small nod; Kevin nodded too, glad that Edd seemed to have believed him, not that he shouldn't, since Kevin really was telling the truth.

"I...I've never been too good for all this feelings stuff so I don't know...how to go about this...uhmm...heh, actually, I guess this is the problem to begin with."

Double D quirked an eyebrow and looked at him curiously, "What do you mean?"

"I mean... it means... it means you got to me dude...you slowly but surely managed to get imprinted in my mind." Both boys began to blush furiously as Kevin's words slipped out of his mouth - cautiously, but honestly.

"At first I thought there was no way, y'know? Like... I thought that all I felt for you was something between friends, between brothers even...like... like an older brother looking out for his younger brother..."

'Brothers?...That's it then? I'm his little brother?"Thought the sockhead, "Kevin, while I appreciate the 'brotherly' sentiment, I do not need you to care for me like a child, I'm pe-"

"Please let me finish."

"Right. Excuse me, Kevin."

"Anyway... I was so sure that was it, my friend, my brother, nothing less and nothing more... But I was wrong... Boy, was I ever wrong..." Kevin let out a breathy chuckle and continued, "I began to feel jealous, of Nat mostly... To be honest... The two of you just seemed so close, so comfortable with each other, and I'm thinking like 'wait, aren't I supposed to be the one closest to him? I've known him longer. Aren't I supposed to be the brother? Shouldn't he be comfortable with me?' and then I realized, that no, you shouldn't have... I treated you and your friends like shit since I can remember, and it was all mostly Eddy, but you and Ed always got in the crossfire between us... But I was just a kid... a hotheaded kid at that... I never hated you Edd. I'd get mad, sure, but, I never hated you; hell, I never even truly hated Eddy... After the whole fiasco with his older brother - you remember, back at that lame-ass amusement park? With the whale trailer? Yeah - I realized that yeah I can't stand this kid 90% of the time, and I may have hit him once or twice to teach him a lesson, but I'd never want any real harm on him, or Ed, and definitely none on you."

"So... I'm not just a brother then?" Edd stood up from the swing and was now right in front of the flustered redhead.

"No... You're not." Kevin took a step closer to Edd, and his skin tingled and he could feel the faint hair on his arms and the back of his neck stand as if electricity surrounded them; but, it was a nice little spark. He bit his lower lip and mustered all the courage he could, and slowly grabbed onto Edd's hand lightly. Edd looked down to their now joined hands, eyes wide and skin pink in surprise. "I like you... A lot actually... I told you back the halloween party, and I meant it, I still do. The thing with Nat... Well, it completely threw me off... I was pissed, I was hurt... But I was wrong... In the sense that I should've listened to what you had to say... And maybe things wouldn't have been as bad."