Hidden secrets

Its all my fault

Nat's pov
After we finish our tacos and frozen ,which might I add was amazing, I went for a nap but I just couldn't help thinking about yelena, Ivan, everything it was only 4pm and Steve fell asleep half way through the movie so I decide to take a walk, fury is still sorting out that safe house so I should be ok to be gone for an hour or so and ever since the helicarrier has been grounded from the explosion I've been hoping I'd be able to get out and get some fresh air and finally I get the chance.
* * *
I smile as I breathe in the sweet smell of fresh air, I finally get to be alone and have some proper time to my self.
I walk down the street smiling until a boy bumps into me who must be 13-14 years old
"Oh sorry" he says before looking up at me
"Oh my gosh your, your blackwidow!" He shouts I blush and smile
"Yeah" I say with a small smile
"I saw you on tv beating up aliens and robots, your so awesome!"
"Thank you kid, hey what's your name?" I ask
"Oh my gosh um, Jacob"
"Well hi Jacob" I say
"Do you mind signing this?" He asks holding up one of his school textbooks and a pen
"Sure" I say whilst writing my signature I smile and hand him the book back
"I can't believe I met an avenger!" He shouts
"Hey Jacob I got to go but I'll see you around" I smile and shake his hand
"Oh my god ok bye" he runs off round a corner but drops his papers, I call after him but he doesn't hear, I pick up all the pieces of the papers and smile at the doodles on them, I run round the corner and are shocked at what I see
"Jacob" I shout with worry, I run towards his limp body bleeding out on the floor and I look to his chest to see a knife sticking out of it, I call out for the pedestrians to call 911 and talk to Jacob
"Listen your gonna be okay" I say with a tear roll down my face
"They- told me" he coughs, and again "to tell you, that they won't give up"
"No No no no, shh don't talk keep your strength up"
"Whoever they are" cough " beat them, be the blackwidow, my hero" he falls limp, I check his throat to find a pulse but it's just simply not there, I start cpr but none of it works, I begin sobbing uncontrollably getting the looks of people as tears fall on their faces as well
"This is all my fault, I'm so sorry Jacob" I close his limp eyelids and fall back crying into my hands, crying because this is all my fault crying because he's dead because of me, I open my eyes again at the sound of sirens and see something in his hand, the text book, I open it up to see my signature covered in his blood, more tears fall down my face as I flick the page to see a note from yelena
This boy is dead because of you, how many more innocents will die because of your defiance to your country, you know what to do, and if not, more innocents will die and yet more red will be in your ledger, think wisely Natalia
I scrunch the note up in my pocket and run into the shadows as the ambulances pull up, I run faster than I ever had before heading straight to Steve, to his warm arms, the only arms that can comfort me right now.
I stick to ally ways and roof tops as I can't exactly walk back with Jacobs blood all over me and my eyes puffy from the tears that refuse to stop falling, I slip slightly on the roof but still carry on jumping from rooftop to rooftop till I reach the shield base where the helicarrier is based, I easily sneak in and make note to make fury upgrade security, I sneak past all the guards and get to the control room and knock, I have a feeling of  of déjà vu  but that soon fades when Steve looks at me, instead of relief and happiness, it's worried and fearful, I look at him, so innocent and worried and imagine that's how Jacob probably would have looked at his moment of the end and tears just fall down my face, I can not cage them any longer and they fall and won't stop, Steve stops his convocation with hill and runs straight towards me and pulls me into his arms in a big hug, I cry into his shoulders feeling his heart beat which just makes me cry even more realizing Jacob hasn't got one anymore
"Shh nat it's ok, your ok"
"I'm not" I cry into his shoulders
"I know you don't want to talk about it now but I need to know what happened and whose blood that it?"
He still holds me in his embrace, I gather up all the confidence I can muster up and pull away
"It's uh, not mine it's a boy 13 maybe 14 years old, and he's dead because of me and it's all my fault" he gives me a heartbroken look and pulls me into his arms again
"Shh nat it's ok come on I'll take you to your room and you have a lie down and we'll have plenty of time to talk about this later on the plane journey to fury's secret base" I nod at his response and walk out with Steve, holding onto his soft warm hands but all I could think about was Jacob
This was all my fault
All my fault.

A/N aww poor nat and sorry this was a short one but new chapters coming soon :) and as always guys please vote, comment and follow thanks for reading 
-shield135 x