murderer - frerard

[023]

I stood behind the door for what felt like forever before Ray even knocked, and then a few more seconds to make it not seem like I was waiting, which was exactly what I was doing, but Ray didn't need to know all of that.

"Hey," I said, opening the door and stepping back to let him in, "how're you doing?"

In reply, Ray lifted his shirt to show off a pretty impressive scar just above his navel. I smiled faintly and rolled up my sleeve to reveal my own scar, with a light, "You win."

We sat on the couch for a while before Ray spoke up, "So, uh..where's Mikey?"

I frowned, biting at my lip ring, before folding my hands in my lap and choosing my words carefully. "Mikey, you see, he had schizophrenia —"

"I didn't ask for his whole life story, man," Ray said, and it made it a little harder on me, in all honesty.

"He committed suicide," I said in the softest of voices. "They had a funeral service, like, Wednesday, but I didn't know much about it. Gerard didn't go, either."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Ray didn't look very sorrowful. He looked indifferent to the matter, which put me off a little.

"I didn't wanna talk to you, and I'm pretty sure I still don't want to, so I suggest you leave." My voice was growing louder and my body felt hot. I couldn't stand the fact that Ray was essentially the reason Mikey had died and he didn't even care.

"Chill," he said nonchalantly, shrugging. "You didn't know him, and neither did I."

It was true that I didn't know Mikey well, but I had known him, and seeing that Ray had caused so much pain to Gerard (and Mikey, for that matter) angered me deeply. I realized just how much of a self-absorbed asshole Ray was; it was so blatantly obvious that I didn't know how I'd missed it before. "You obviously knew him well enough to get him to help you murder someone!" I yelled, my hands flying to my hair and I wanted to pull every last strand out of their follicles and Ray's too.

"You know?" Ray gasped, shooting to his feet and I didn't even realize the cool steel barrel of the gun was pressed against my skull until I heard him click the bullet into the chamber. I didn't even know Ray had a gun, let alone that he knew how to work the goddamned things.

"Ray —" I started, my hands beginning to shake. "Ray, I —"

"I swear if you tell anyone anything, I will hunt you down and you will regret it."

"Fuck off, Ray!" I spat, carefully calculating my surroundings, but seeing as he was the one with the pistol and I was the defenseless one, there wasn't much I could do. I took a leap of faith, however shitty and not very well planned, and brought my heel to his shin with every ounce of force I could muster.

I knew it wouldn't work. I knew it before I even did it. But it did get the barrel of that gun away from my temple, and while the shot was not fatal, it was painful. There was a loud BANG, and I was getting pretty tired of hearing loud noises, because they never brought anything good upon the world. In this case, the BANG indicated that the trigger had been pulled, and the bullet had found its way into my midriff.

hello and once again, i need to stop writing lmao but o h w e l l : )
also we all hate ray right bc mmmm i know i do

does this fic seem cliché to anyone bc pls tell me if it is,,, i don't wanna be cliché

wow there are going to be like 7382 chapters if i don't stop r u guys ok with that or

[update 3/21/16]
hey guys guess what
im literally Alive
how surprising is that

but anyway,, im sorry i know i haven't been updating but i've been very very tired because honours is kicking my ass !! ive been writing though i promise

[UPDATE 3/22]

THREE Y EARS GUYS THREE YESRS IT HAS BEEN THREE YEARS

"The last three years definitely feel like ten. In a much better place- happy, productive. Of course I miss everyone.Thanks for the support❤️"
I AM READY TO THEOW MYSELF OFF A BRIDGE