Seawater || ✔️

17

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I could feel the salty spray entering and exiting my lungs. I scrunched up sand into my fists.

I was right back to where this all started. The ocean. I guess it ends here too.

The events of the week had been...interesting to say the least.

Jake admitted he was in love with me. Not Cole. No one saw that coming.

I can't help feeling that it's my fault. Maybe I led him on or something...

I tried to push back the tears.

I looked out at the horizon. It was almost dark, the sun already below the waves. There was still a glow about the air, but nothing harsh.

I sighed. What would everyone think of me? What would Cole think of me? And Jake's mom?

After all, I was the reason her son was locked up in a mental facility.

I tucked my knees into my chest and locked my arms around my shins. Sighing, I settled my chin on my knees, keeping my eyes on the horizon.

The ocean seemed to be the only thing I had left. Well, I still had Olive, but she seemed kind of shaken and distant since shiz hit the fan.

The beach was mostly empty now, only a few stray joggers left. That's why I was surprised when I felt someone come up behind me.

I turned around. Cole.

My heart picked up in my chest.

He took a seat in the sand next to me. "Hey."

I swallowed my nerves. "Hey?"

"Can we talk?" he asked, rubbing the back of his neck. I nodded.

"I guess."

There was an awkward moment of silence.

"I just need to get a few things out, okay? You don't have to say anything."

I nodded again.

"You can't blame yourself for this. As much as you want to say it's your fault, it's not. None of us could've expected this. And as much as I want to be there for Jake, how do you forgive someone for doing something like that? I mean, not only did he poison me and threaten you, but he was in love with you. He was in love with my girl. How am I supposed to react?"

I can't deny that my heart fluttered a bit at the words 'my girl'.

"I don't know Cole," I whispered. "I don't know."

"I knew you were lying when you broke up with me," he said. I was shocked. I guess I'm not as good of an actress as I thought.

"I knew that there had to be some other reason. At least I hoped there was anyway. But then I realized, there doesn't have to be another reason. We broke up. It didn't matter how it happened, but obviously neither of us were willing to fight for what we had."

And by neither of us, he meant me. It was my fault, and my fault alone. He fought, and I didn't.

"I don't blame you for not telling anyone when you got the threats. I mean, who could've known not to trust Jake? I would have done the same. So, I forgive you."

I could only nod, my throat constricting.

"But you were right when you said all of those things when you broke up with me. Maybe we just weren't meant to last."

The tears were coming and I couldn't stop them.

"So I'm letting you go. I don't want to, but I don't think I can fight anymore."

Tears rolled down my cheeks.

"I'm sorry," I finally managed to choke out. "I'm sorry for being weak."

He didn't say anything, he just stared at me.

"I never deserved you," I whispered.

He shook his head. "Don't say that. You deserve to be happy, okay? I'm just sorry it couldn't be me to make you happy."

He smiled sadly.

He leaned in and held my chin up, kissing my lips softly. It was the kind of kiss that ran through your veins and spread everywhere, one that you would replay in your mind for months to come.

He pulled back with another sad smile.

Then he got up, dusted off his shorts, and left.

<><><>

I had the traditional pity party for a couple of days. I ate ice cream with Olive and watched horror movies. The typical post-breakup remedy.

If you could even call it a breakup, cause technically, we broke up a while ago.

I soon started to regain my emotional strength, convincing myself that it was all for the best.

Though there was still a hole in my heart that only Cole could fill, I knew that after everything that had happened, there was no longer use in holding out hope.

We were done, for good this time.

I didn't speak to him for an entire month. Yeah, we saw each other, and yeah, we smiled, but it was always forced and awkward, something it had never been between us before.

I mentally told myself that I would be taking a break from guys until college.

And truth be told, I really did miss him. I missed him a lot. Not just romantically, but as a friend.

He made me feel things that I'd never felt for anyone else.

I missed our conversations, how I could open up to him. I missed how he would rub the back of his neck when he was nervous. I missed how he would hum guitar toons so badly it was painful. I missed how his lips felt against mine. But most of all, I missed how he could make me laugh. He didn't make me feel insecure, or ugly, or annoying.

He brought out the best in me.

And all I could ever think about was how I always brought out the worst in him.

<><><>

I AM SO SORRY ABOUT THIS SHORTIE BUT IT HAD TO BE THAT WAY.

I am going to do a time jump so I had to end this here.

I know you may hate Devin (I kinda hate her too) but not every protagonist is perfect and can do no wrong. The plot of this book is a girl who screws everything up, basically.

I am fully aware that these characters have absolutely no personality, and I'm sorry about this. I started writing this story a long time ago, and since then it has become a pet peeve of mine when the protagonist is a brick who can't do anything.

I have been making new stories where the characters are much more developed, some of which are yet to be posted.

However, I want to say thank you to those of you who have stuck through the crap writing in this story. It will be coming to an end after several more chapters, so just keep reading, cause the ending will be worth it!!

Thank you,

-- Molly