chapter 11

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Jimmy's POV 

I was starting to feel a little worried about Rhaea. We had been on this tour for about a month now and she had started to isolate herself more and more from the world. From everything. She barely came to the shows anymore, almost never hung out with the rest of us and the only one she really actually talked to was me, not even Myra. I had no idea why she was doing this and it was driving me crazy. 

I had asked her to explain to me what was going on so many times but she never told me. She always said that it wasn't anything but everyone could see that something was up. 

The guys were worried too. They always asked me what was happening to her and I could never answer them since I didn't know either. 

I went to Rhaea and my bunk where I knew I would find her. She laid in the bunk and just stared up in the ceiling like she always did. 

"Hey", I said and laid down next to her. 

"Hi", she said and looked at me. "How did the show go?" 

"Really good, you should've been there", I said.

"I knew you'd say that", she sighed and turned around so she was facing the wall. 

"hey look at me", I said and tried her to turn around again. 

"No Jimmy. You'll only try to make me tell you why I never show up and I don't want to talk about that", she said. 

"You don't want to talk about anything anymore. You haven't even left the bus for a week!" I said. 

I was starting to get frustrated. I had no idea how to get to her anymore. 

"I'm just not in the mood right now", she said. "Why do you have to keep bringing that up?" 

"Because I love you Rhaea and I want you to start living your life again", I said. 

She looked at me with really sad eyes, it almost looked like she was on the verge of crying though she never did. 

"Just let it go", she said and turned around again. 

I sighed and jumped down from the bunk. There was no point. 

Matt, who laid in his bunk, got out of it and walked after me to the living room. "Anything?" he asked. 

"Nope… not that I expected it either", I said. 

"I really don't understand what's up with her. It's like she just turned a page and became a whole different person", he said. 

"Yeah… I don't know. She's just sad about something and I can't seem to figure out what it is", I said. 

Rhaea's POV 

Jimmy got out of the bunk and left me alone again. I could feel the tears burn behind my eyes but I wouldn't let them fall. I hated that I turned Jimmy away like that, that I did it towards everyone but I didn't know how not to. I didn't even know why I did it. I didn't know why I felt like I did. I was just so unhappy for some reason. I just felt so alone. Suddenly it was like everyone I knew had become strangers even though I loved them all at the same time. I was just so confused. 

"Rhaea?" Myra said behind me.

She stood next to my bunk and looked at me with those puppy eyes of hers. 

"Yeah?" I said and turned around so I was facing her. 

"Don't do this", she said.

"Do what?" I asked.

"Don't push Jimmy away like that. He only wants you to be happy, don't you see that?" she asked.

I chose not to answer that. 

"I don't know why you're feeling like you did but it won't get any better just because you lay here all day. You can't make your life better if you don't live it", she said. 

I just looked at her, not saying anything. 

What was I supposed to say? I didn't it to be like this either but I didn't know what to do. I didn't feel for anything except just being here alone. I had no idea what to do, didn't know what I wanted anymore. 

"Why are you still here?" I asked her when she never left and just kept on looking at me.

"Because I want to see if you still have some emotion left in that body of yours! I want my sister back", she said. 

I could hear on her voice just how frustrated she was. Couldn't they all just let it go? 

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