The Want to Live

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Being a little kid, I've always wanted to grow up

and just if I had a bad day or know that it was gonna be a bad week or something, then I kept wishing for it to be over.

And yet I still have papers and tons of homework
and just the pressures of fitting into society
and looking nice
and being pushed around
and getting weird looks when I say that I don't wear makeup
or that I don't want to have a boyfriend
or say I have insecurities

It all just brings me down

Because I know that there will be more pressures with more papers
and more due dates and then bills to pay
and a family to keep to and just life is so pressuring.

I want to just sleep.

Or have the money to go on a vacation.

Forever.

Or just to go somewhere where I never have to do something and just never come back.

Or to just live a different lifestyle cause I like change,
Sometimes.

And yet I still live in this world and in this house with all these pressures and just everything

and I want to give up.

Like to get away from things that need to be done.

I need to live.


~•-•~
A friend's response to that:
"...But that's what i live for. The hope that I'm gonna be fine in the furture. To have some time to go out and have fun and not worry about papers"

~•-•~
But then again, how long can I keep hoping?

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