I'm back
Hi
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Q: Why did the can crusher quit his job?
A: Because it was soda pressing.
Q: Can February march?
A: No, but April may.
Q: Why didn't the sailors play cards?
A: Because the captain was on the deck.
A blonde approaches a stranger and asks what time it is. The stranger says, "11:45." The blonde says, "Really? That's so weird. Every time I ask that question, I get a different answer."
A lot of people cry when they cut an onion. The trick is not to form an emotional bond.
So a man dies, goes to Heaven, and sees St. Peter. There are many clocks surrounding him so the man asks, "What are these clocks for?" St. Peter replies, "These are lie clocks, they tick once for every lie you tell. Here we have Mother Teresa's clock. She has never lied so the clock has not moved. Honest Abe has only lied twice in his life, so it has only ticked twice." The man then asks, "So where is my clock?" St. Peter replies, "Oh, that is in Jesus' office, he is using it as a ceiling fan!"
YOU ARE READING
The Comedy of all Comedy's (Not really)
HumorAlmost all these jokes are made up 8P (I think) If you heard them before please comment THANKS 8D
