One day, Kristen Stewart woke up with the intention of doing something fun. She had no work that day, so why not try something new? She could always go out with her friends and share small talks about her days, but ... it wouldn't be the same. She really wasn't in the mood to sit down in a coffee shop and chit chat with the girls. She didn't want to stay at home either. But what could the actress do?
Hmm , she though, her finger pressed on her chin, as if she was thinking hard. Think. Think. Think! Something fun ... challenging ... no work ... acting ... disguise. Aha! Disguise! She could disguise herself as someone and walk around like that! The problem was as who she could dress up.
Looking around her clothes, she found a bunch of different costumes with accompanying accessories. From fairy wings to angel halos. She would look ridiculous in all of these. Plus it wasn't Halloween. Still searching through her wardrobe (which was so untidy, that even the cat would never find her kittens there), she got an idea. A man. She could be a man for a day. At least to look like one.
She remembered, when she was a young girl, because of her tomboyish looks, she would usually be mistaken as a boy. As soon as she hit puberty and her womanly curves redesigned their way to show up to the world, everybody realized that Kristen Stewart was a girl. Perhaps, if she hid all of those curves and wore a hat to hide her hair, people could mistaken her as a teenage boy. So she did. She wanted to experiment - to see who would recognize her and who would just brush it off.
Walking around Los Angeles in her manly disguise, Kristen wasn't used to the fact that there weren't paparazzi around her. A piece of solitude! Little did they know it was actually a woman behind the moustache and the male clothes.
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"Mr. Stewart" eventually got hungry and tired of walking. So she decided to stop for a meal and a drink at her favourite restaurant in the city centre. When she entered, inhaling the aroma of homemade food plastered a smile on her face.
"Good afternoon, Sir," greeted politely a waitress and our heroine nodded at her.
"Do you have a reservation, Sir?" , continued the waitress. When Kristen shook her head no, she was immediately seated in a private area for non-smokers, despite the fact that she was a smoker herself. They had called her "Sir". Her plan was working. Yay! Maybe she could fool even more people if she was doing as good job as she was doing at the moment.
She looked around. Luckily, no one besides the waitress from earlier had noticed her presence in the restaurant. And she didn't seem to notice anyone familiar. Still, she has to be cautious. What if anyone recognized her?that would be just terrifying.
Her eyes widened. Robert "The Douchebag" Pattinson. What the fuck was he doing there? And with a girlfriend? Her heart started racing. What if he saw her? She quickly looked down at the menu, hoping he and his slut of a girlfriend would leave. Alas, they seemed to have other plans.
Kristen tried to hide her face with the menu, only letting her eyes to be seen. Big mistake! He would recognize her by her eyes. Those forest green eyes.
Sadly, while trying to find a table for himself and for his "girlfriend" , Robert began looking around and noticed our heroine. He immediately realized that something was wrong. Even from the distance, he saw her eyes and recognized them, just as the actress had predicted it would happen.
"Kristen?" , he called. Her chest tightened. She didn't dare to look up. She was playing a role and if she wanted to do well - no, scratch that, convincing - she had to work harder.
His footsteps could be heard louder and louder by the second. He was approaching her. Oh, dear Lord! Help our heroine!
"Kristen," he repeated, trying to sound tough. It wasn't working. She was still hiding her face with the menu, pretending to look at the food.
He pulled her menu from her hands, causing her to yell at him:
"What the fuck, man?"
Oops. Now she was so caught. She wasn't supposed to talk much, nor even swear. She was dead. And on top of that, some people had turned around to see what was going to happen.
Robert was mad. He knew that it was Kristen. Why wouldn't she admit it? Why was she doing silly things? What was intended by that?
"Stop making a fool of yourself!" , and with that he pulled her fake moustache - causing her to hiss from pain - and her hat at the same time. Her hair fell down her shoulders and the truth about her had prevailed. Some people gasped. Others took out their phones and began taking photos. Like they hadn't seen a woman disguise herself as man.
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And him - how could he humiliate her like that in public? Had he no shame? She looked around, then at him and screamed at his face, tears threatening to spill any minute:
"You, motherfucking dumbass!" She pointed at him with his finger. "You ruined everything!"
And she stomped out of the restaurant, leaving people to wonder had she gone insane. Like she cared about that. Why of all people, he had to appear suddenly and to ruin her whole day?
Fuck my life, she thought.
Sitting on the cold steps of the restaurant, she returned back in the days when he was hers and she was his. If they were dating, or at least even friends, would he support her to do this teeny tiny experiment? The answer was no. How could he let her dress like a man, even for a day?
She felt his presence, when he tapped her shoulder. However, she didn't want to talk to him, at all. She was exceptionally offended at him.
He sat next to her.
"Kristen, I'll ask you something, but promise not to get mad, okay?" , he was looking right in her eyes. "Are you transsexual?"
She stared at him in disbelief, her mouth half-opened. Was he that dumb? She stood up sharply, facing him.
"Dude, how dare you think I'm transsexual? I'm a fuckin' woman, man! I'm gonna be a mom someday and I'm gonna have kids and-"
He did the dumbest thing, the most cliché thing - he smashed his lips to hers. A kiss in the heat of the moment. And the strangest and unexpected thing for him? She didn't turn him down. Rather than, she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her and deepening the kiss. She had missed his kisses. Her lips had missed his.
"I love you," he said when they broke apart from each other. He sounded so sincere. If so, why was he with a girlfriend at the restaurant? Why hadn't he called her? So many unanswered questions.
Why did she let him kiss her? Why did she let herself be reminded of him? Such a fool she was! No wonder she had been abandoned so many times.
At least she learned what it was like to be a man for a day. And she didn't regret it.
