Getting Over Matt

30 - "You're a wonderful distraction."

Chapter 30 - "You're a wonderful distraction."

"I can't believe you've still not slept together."

"Jess!" I nearly choked on my sandwich, eyes darting around to see if anyone had overheard.

Winter was gradually turning into spring and our final A-Level exams loomed. The panic was finally beginning to set in for those students who desperately needed decent exam results to get into their university of choice. Jess was certainly one of those students, but it seemed she was still preoccupied with other matters.

"What?" she asked innocently. "Since when did you become such a prude? I thought Nathan would make you the exact opposite?"

"And why's that?"

"Well, he doesn't exactly make a secret of his sexual prowess," she said with a defensive shrug.

"That's the reason we're taking it slow. He wants a clear line between sex then and now."

Her lips twitched. "Maybe he's feeling the pressure because he's worried you'll expect him to blow your mind."

I had absolutely no doubt that he would blow my mind, but obviously I hadn't said that to him, just in case he really was worried about it.

"How many girls has he slept with, anyway?" she asked, intrigue blooming in her eyes.

"Don't know. A lot."

"Like, roughly? Twenty? Fifty? A hundred? He's only nineteen. Mathematically, it can't be a huge number."

The conversation had only come up once between us. I'd asked out of genuine curiosity and nothing more, but Nathan had brushed the question under the carpet. He didn't want to talk about it. I respected that and let it drop, and it had only reinforced my suspicion that his past had a lot to do with why he wanted to wait now.

"I think it's more likely that he has a certain timeframe in his head he wants to follow," I said. "And that's fine. If he wants to wait, for whatever reason, I'm happy to wait."

"Fair enough. Maybe it's the six-month mark. You've been together, what, five months now? You're over Matt...well, as over a person that you loved as you can be—"

"I wasn't in love with Matt," I interrupted. "I realise that now."

"You still had strong feelings for him."

I shrugged dismissively, not wanting to discuss how strongly I'd felt about a guy who'd treated me so callously, but at least it gave me a route out of the conversation around sex with Nathan.

"To be honest, I'm really surprised him and Lucy are lasting this long," I said instead.

Matt and Lucy were still dating but they were pretty quiet about it. They weren't all over each other in public but something must have been working because neither of them had wanted to break it off yet. I had to admit that a small part of me had hoped it wouldn't work out. Even having someone as wonderful as Nathan didn't make the jealousy go away that Matt could be happy with someone who wasn't me. I clearly hadn't made him happy enough, and that was a hard thought for anyone to deal with.

"Me, too," Jess said, glancing over at them. "But anyway...you and Nathan? I thought you said it was really difficult to stop? So how have you lasted over five months?"

"Because Italy taught us something," I told her. "Yes it was hard to stop, and he does still send my body wild sometimes, but we've learnt to control it more."

"But tonight...?" she pressed, raising her eyebrows suggestively.

"What about tonight?"

"He's cooking you a meal, isn't he? Maybe he's trying to seduce you," she teased.