Because Of The Bucket List

Chapter 26

Chapter 26

I have never been so happy in my life. I love being in Florida. I love Disney World. I love my life with Jace and Emma. This is the best Christmas in the world. Today is our second day here. Yesterday once we got here, we unpacked and cleaned up. After, we took Emma to the pool. Luckily, I figured they would have an indoor pool, so I brought my hottest bikini. A cute black outlined bikini with bright pink Aztec. I felt very comfortable with how much of my boobs it showed, surprisingly. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not the kind of girl who wants to attract guys who just want sex. But, I like Jace and I want to make him like me and showing a little cleavage never killed anybody.

Today we've been riding all the rides and playing games. We took Emma to one of the best little girls boutique. The Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique. Like the Cinderella God-mother thing? Either way, she loved it and so did I. Jace not so much. He hated sitting in the tiny little chairs they had waiting for me and Emma to pick outfits and such. I actually bought Emma some very cute dresses and flats. She looked adorable with her hair (what little she has) all dolled up.

Now we're on the way to see the Castle Lights. Apparently, we get to ride huge floats with different Disney characters while we watch fireworks go off from behind the Princess Castle that is lite up with Christmas lights. I'm actually surprised at how much fun Jace and I have been having together. He hasn't been an ass lately and in a way that is great. But, he being nice and sometimes sweet makes my feelings for him deeper.

* * *

Sadly, we're leaving tomorrow. Thankfully we've had all the fun you possibly could in Disney World. We went to all the places for Christmas events. We had a blast at the Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party and the Mickey's Once Upon a Christmastime Parade.

Tonight I can't sleep. I don't want to leave and go back home. I want to stay here with Jace and Emma. Just live in a very pink hotel room in Disney World. I can't though. Layla has called every day since we got here. She hates me for being here without her. I hate it to, but I wasn't even supposed to be here with Jace and Emma. I was supposed to be here with Natalie. This whole list was supposed to be done with her. She isn't supposed to be dead. She's supposed to be here. Not in a damn grave.

J A C E

I lie awake. I can't sleep in this pink ass room.

Okay, well maybe I can't sleep because of Elle. I don't want to go home. I want to stay here with her and my daughter. I don't want to go home and go back to school and everything. I've had the best time of my life here. It's like we forgot who we are. We get to be kids here. Of course we're not and we've had to take care of Emma and make sure she's had a good time, but we've got to have fun and not worry about anything. Not even worry about how I'm feeling about her. At home I'm constantly on my toes wondering if I'm showing to many feelings towards her. Being her I haven't had to worry about that. I've been free to show her. Disney has changed me. I know I sound stupid, but it's true.

I know she's awake too. I can hear her crying. It's weird but I know exactly why, too. I'm not supposed to be here with her. She's supposed to be here with Natalie. She's supposed to be doing the whole bucket list with her. I know it hurts her when she thinks about it. It hurts me knowing there's nothing I can do for her while she's crying.

"Jace?" I hear her ask softly. Should I answer of leave her be.

Silence.

"Jace. Please be awake I need someone to talk to."

Now I have to answer. "What is it?" I whisper.

"You're up?" She asks.

"Yup. I can't sleep in this Pink ass room. I feel like the damn princess are gonna jump out at any minute." I laugh trying to lighten the mood.

I hear her sniffle and laugh softly. "Yeah, it wasn't our best idea. But Emma loved it so much."

"What's wrong Elle? Why are you really awake right now?" I ask her softly.

"I-I just keep thinking about..." she stops and I know what she was gonna say.

"Natalie." I finish.

"Yeah." She sighs. "I've had a great time here. I really have. But she was supposed to be here. And she isn't."

"I know, Elle. I know it hurts you, but I she's here." I try to comfort.

"What do you mean?" She asks.

"I mean she is here. She's with you in your heart. Deep down you feel it too. I know because I always feel my parents with me. Somehow they're with us. Maybe not physically, but they are here." I tell her.

"I know. I feel her with me constantly. I just don't want to. It hurts too much." She sniffles. I know she's still crying and it's breaking my damn heart.

"I know Elle." I sigh.

"Hey Jace?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for everything."

"You're welcome, Elle." I tell her and I can finally drift to sleep.