32: I'm so sorry...

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I was like a Hannah Montana in man version.

Hannah lived the best of both worlds, while I lived the worst of both worlds.

Yeah, you heard that right. Both my lives were the worst right now.

"Have you seen Julie?" Luke asks, me, as I shook my head.

"She's packing for college." I said flatly.

"What? She never told me anything about--"

"She doesn't like you, Luke. I told you, you might as well forget about her."

"But.. I can't." He spoke quietly, his eyes softening.

"If she can do it, then you can too. Just let her go." I spat, tears threatening to spill out.

Instead I just held them back, a pained look appearing on his face.

"Do you want her all to yourself, is that why?.. Dammit I should've known."

"I don't. You know that's not why." I rose my voice

"Well why then? Why do you want me to let go of her so badly then?!''

I didn't answer. "She's not who you think she is." Was all I said before I turned around and started to leave.

"Ju--Justin!' Lily almost said it, as she ran over to me.

"I'm sorry." She said. "Mandy wishes you all the luck."

I nodded slightly. "It isn't luck that I need.." I smiled weakly, shrugging.

"I have to let go of him, this part of me just won't let me.." I sighed, closing my eyes.

"Then don't." She says quietly, hugging me. "Keep him. He might be something else.. I mean it's Luke Hemmings, Jules.. Things like this just don't happen."

I shrugged. "Maybe I was better off without meeting them at all."

"Don't say that." She hushed, shaking her head.

I sighed, seeing how depressed Luke looked, a distance away with the other boys.

Yet again, I felt guilty.. I shouldnt have said any of that at all though. Ashton was right.

Maybe if I just..

I sighed loudly, running the opposite direction and turning the corner.

"Where are you going?!" Lily called, me ignoring it.

But this was the problem with me.. One moment I'd try to let him go, but then the guilt just gets to me.

I never want to see him hurt.

A guy like Luke deserves to be happy.

But it had to end either way. The good or the bad. It was one way or another.

I dialled in Luke, waiting for the rings to pass before he hopefully answered.

My heart just broke probably..

"Julie?"

"Hey um, hey Luke." I spoke anxiously. "I-I just wanted to say goodbye, before I head off to college." Tears threatened to spill once again, as I bit my lip to hold them back.

Blinking my tears away, there was a silence at the other end of the line.

"What? I-it just.. It just ends that way? And you tell me through the phone, wh-why couldn't I see you before you left.." His voice was unsteady, as I sighed, tears brimming in my eyes.

"I'm sorry, Luke. I told you I couldn't be with you."

I was already crying at how much this hurt so badly, I just..

Why was this so hard for me to do?!

It was for his own good. And mine as well. This had to be done eventually..

I had a week left with them for goodness sake.

I might actually get to finish the dare and be 'okay' with it.

"Julie, I.. I think.."

"No no no no.. Don't say it please." I pleaded, tears filling my eyes and streaming down my face. I knew what he was going to say.

"I love you." He said anyway, nice and clear.

And there goes the first time a boy's ever told me he loved me.

The words reached my head..

I love you..

I sobbed, leaning on the wall as my head hung low.

"Luke." I whispered, closing my eyes.

The words were on the tip of my tongue too. I wanted to say it back, I hope he knows whatever I do, I'll always remember him. I'll always think of him whenever I'm away.

Just.. Always.

"Julie, I-I know you don't want to do this.." He sighed, me shaking my head.

"I'm so sorry." I muttered. "Thanks for everything, okay? Bye."

Before I could hear anything else, I hung up, shakily shoving my phone back into my pocket.

It was over. Finally.

Well not technically, but..

He won't have to see how much of a liar I am, none of the boys would. And I'll get the money too.

That seemed good though, right?..

After this, I won't have to see them again, but maybe secretly keep in touch with Ashton, I mean.. He was actually a great friend, not only Justin's, but Julie's as well.

I would've never forgotten Calum and Michael either. That would've been way to hard.

But it was a week away from where the non existent Justin had to leave as well.

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A/N:

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Updated again! :D

And yep, Julie just did it.. :/ :'(

Sooo please spread this once again too! :)

GUYS SRSLY WHERE ARE ALL MY COMMENTERSSS ):

PLEASE GIVE ME 400 COMMENTS! THAT IS ALL I ASK FOR IN RETURN FOR ALL THESE UPDATES!

OKAY, NEXT UPDATE WILL BE UP WHEN I GET TO 400!

THANKS!!

OH AND GO FOLLOW JULIE ON TWITTER IF YOU LIKE, @JulieStyles96 :)

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- BritishBums xox

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