In Honour of the Heart

Chapter 35 : Fifty thousand tears I have cried.

Chapter 35:

“Every warrior of the light has felt afraid of going into battle.”

~ Paulo Coelho.

**

The sun completed its round since long.  Previously purpled salmon sky gave way to jet black vast expanse that blanketed the whole city. Few myriad stars dotted the inky canopy but a single wispy, grey cloud loomed over the waning moon turning it into a moonless night. The velvety shadows it casted terrified her as the night turned cold and windy.

Isabelle suddenly woke up. She was restless, tossing and turning. When she opened her eyes, everything looked normal for a fraction of second. And then the whole thing came back to haunt her next moment. The room was silent except from the rhythmic breathing of Suzan’s chest. When had she fallen asleep? She made a helpless sound and switched on the bedside lamp.

Her first instinct was to touch her baby’s chubby cheeks lightly.  But her hand went to her daughter’s curls too. It felt so soft. She tucked few hairs behind Suzan’s ear. It never failed to amaze Isabelle how her little girl had her pale blue eyes and fair skin but Isaac’s dark hair. She was okay with Suzan inheriting these physical traits from Isaac but she was not going to let her get affected by his betrayal. She carefully folded the blanket over Suzan. Isabelle got up without noise and stood a few feet from the bed.

She lost a moment’s breath when she observed the place where Isaac slept.  It was still empty. Her eyes blurred with tears. She had never guessed in million years that he will not show up. 

She went to the medicine cabinet in bathroom and took out two white sleeping pills. Isabelle carried a glass of water and sat near her daughter, holding tablets in her palm. She was tempted. It will definitely help her to get much needed rest, putting her mind at ease. But then she looked at her sleeping child. What will happen if Suzan got up in between? Isabelle couldn't take a chance of the drug induced sleep. She sighed and put it back. 

What was that sound? Is someone at door?

She went outside the bedroom. Her eyes fell on the entrance. Was Isaac ringing a bell? She peered out the door keyhole but there was nobody.

With racing heartbeats, she advanced towards side table and picked up her mobile. Perhaps it was buzzing. She fetched it with shaking hands but no, it was not vibrating and there were no missed calls.

She looked at the screen. It was midnight. Where was her husband who had promised to return back in few hours?

Isabelle stood paralysed with the fear which was clutching her heart with each passing minute. May be this was just a dream and she will wake up from this horrible night mare any minute now.  But the pain sliced her like a sharp knife when she realized that Isaac had indeed not come. It was too late and she had lost the battle. Her gaze went to her arms. Without Isaac in it, she felt an emptiness which was now reaching deep in her soul.  

Her mobile screen saver showed a picture of them. It was taken during their friend’s reception party. She kept staring at him. At forty one, he was more energetic than ever thanks to his daily visits to gym. The workouts suited him. His stomach was flat, his shoulders broad and his ripping muscles hidden behind those formal clothes. He did justice to that dark suit, crisp dress shirt and the conservative tie. The man radiated in that attire. How many times she had snuggled in that strong, powerful chest and those arms which had encircled her numerous times promising security and protection forever? Where was he when she needed him most?

Her eyes went to her photograph now.  She looked happy as she smiled in Isaac’s arms in a black dress which he had bought specially for the occasion. Will she ever forget how she had felt when she had worn that small, lacey, seductive thing for the first time? The minute she came out of the room, Isaac’s eyes had travelled along her feminine body. Will she ever forget the way his breath was caught in his throat? He had taken a step closer and put his lips on hers.