Moving to London | Phan ❤

Chapter 8 - Making Pancakes

(Time skip 2 months)

Nothing much has happened, but I have bonded with Dan loads. We have become inseparable. I felt so close to him, I was proud to call him my new best friend, but I have spoken to Jake in five weeks. I haven't spoken to anybody in America for five weeks, including my parents.

I woke up as my alarm clock beeped. It was Saturday, but my alarm felt the need to wake me up at 6.00am, although, I didn't really get much sleep. Lately I have been distant, despite spending my more recent days with Dan, I still feel away from the world.

I crept into the hall and across to Dans room. Opening the door, I heard light snores. I climbed into the bed next to him, snuggling down in the bed before pulling out my phone and playing various apps.

- time skip two hours. -

'Phil?' I heard, a whisper from beside me.

'Sorry, I wasn't tired, and I didn't want to be alone..' I mumbled,

'It's fine, come here.' He moved his arm around me, and pulled me in, making us in a mid spoon cuddle position.

'I like just laying with you.. You make me feel so much more calm, and make my life seem happier.'

'Phil, what's wrong?' Dan asked, pulling the hair that had fallen into my eyes. I trusted him, so I decided to tell him.

'I think- I might be depressed,' I whispered, shivering at the thought of a few nights ago, I cut. Self harmed. Really bad. I fainted from the blood in my room and woke up half an hour later.

'Phil. Why?'

'I don't know.. I just- feel- feel so sad.. And life isn't exactly great, I have no friends..'

'You have me..'

'Yeah, but that's different, you have to be nice to me.'

'PHIL, are you serious?' Dan stopped, pushing me away, looking into my eyes clearly.

'What?' I whispered.

'I have never gotten close to anybody that has ever stayed here before.. Something about you- it made me want to be friends with you.. Phil..'

'You are just saying that..'

'NO! Phil you are amazing, please, don't tell me that. I understand that feeling, I used to have ADHD and anxiety really bad. I used to have frequent panic attacks.. Sometimes I still do. You are normally downstairs but I start screaming and panicking, but there isn't anything I can do, because I have nothing to calm me down so I just have to wait until it goes away and I feel better..'

'Dan, can I tell you something..' I breathed.

'Go for it, I'm always here for you.' He moved his arm out and pulled my back into a cuddle position, squeezing me, and giving me a class on the cheek.

'I think- you are my bestfriend- no. I think your my soulmate.'

'I hope so, I flipping love you man!' Dan giggled, tickling under my chin.

'Sto- aha- stop it- I might pee myself, HAH!' I chirped.

'Oh god, please don't pee yourself, that's the least of my issu- Phil.' He froze.

'Dan?'

'Why?' He whispered. I took a moment to precession what he was talking about, my cuts.

'I- I'm sorry..' I felt my eyes fill with tears, and they began to flow our unevenly, draining my eyes.

'Its okay, no- shhh,' her sat up and he allowed me to cuddle him, soaking his jumper in tears, 'you know you can talk to me, about this anytime, if it's 3am or in the middle of school, just tell me something's up and we can go on a late night walk, or get out of lessons with some excuse..'