Confessions of a closet lesbian (GirlxGirl) - A lesbian love story

Apologies

28th November 2011

Dear Diary,

Once again I was partnered with Sarina in physics - awkward, because Jamie was sat across the table from us this time and she kept shooting me worried looks. Other than that it wasn't too bad until she decided (for some reason) to start making comments about our last lesson together loudly enough for the whole bench to hear. It's times like that that leave me wondering why I actually like her...

Apparently she noticed me fidgeting and looking uncomfortable - or she noticed Jamie glaring daggers at her - because she apologised to me. The rest of the lesson was spent with our legs brushing together which honestly made me forget all about her being mean. Once she even 'accidentally' put her hand on top of mine and let it linger for a moment too long. I know I shouldn't read into it but it's hard not to when the touches seemed so deliberate.

Since starting this diary, everything has moved so fast! A week ago, no one knew my secret and my crush didn't know I existed. Now Jamie knew about me and Sarina (maybe?) was flirting with me! When I sat next to Jamie in my next class, History, I knew I was blushing. She gave me a look that said she wanted to hear every detail but I was sure I saw an emotion cross her face, fast as lightening, that I just couldn't place... Anger maybe? It went as quickly as it came, replaced by a knowing smile. I had meant to ask about it but we had a lecture that lesson and no time at all to talk.

You know, I thought writing all of this down would help, but I'm becoming more and more confused. It's now ten minutes to midnight and I'm writing with my eyes half closed so I need to go and sleep so I don't look like a zombie at school. Nighty, night!

D x