Misplaced Trust

Chapter 10

Chapter 10

August 2014

It was supposed to be a good day for Lucy and me. I was going to go out on my first date with Cameron. I can still recall, August 2014 – two months after our official encounter.

Ava helped me out, she promised to give me her signature black dress. Tight at the chest, and flowy at the skirt – just like a ballerina really. If I twirled, the skirt would dance along with me in rhythm. She also offered to lightly curl my hair, as close to perfection as possible. She also performed her artistic skill of makeup, plumping my lips with the perfect matte lipstick as well flicking eyeliner at the outer corner of my eye, going for the sexy cat-eye appeal.

My first date was supposed to beautiful. Don't get me wrong. It was. Cameron dressed up, reminding me of a groom prepared for his wedding day. Black suit, black tie, his usually messy dirty blond hair slicked back neatly.

Candles flickered along with the twinkling stars. Colourful lanterns danced above us while the moon sat alone, languishing while admiring the two lovers who were sharing a romantic meal.

Meanwhile, back at home, a life was at stake. The last time I would ever see her would be with blood oozing, puddles and rivers, and a waterfall of blood running from her wrists. Scattered white pills, blue pills, and any pill you could possibly imagine, laying around her body. Her hand numb and hurt, grasping out for the empty orange pill bottle, reaching out for her last breath, last heart beat, last thought spent all alone. Meanwhile, her selfish sister – me – was batting her eyelashes at the boy who called her pretty, her hand reaching out to his, her lips colliding with his, unaware that the only thing that would be colliding soon, would be heaven and earth. Spits of fire would be raining from up above, sadness overflowing and misery overpowering.

He offered to take me home. And I just wish I had invited him inside, maybe things would have been different.

-

As Mia enters the house she calls out for her sister. The house is empty and silent; the walls are the only ones breathing, providing oxygen and life. The plants drooping their leaves and the flower petals from vases placed here and there changing colour. Pale, rotten, dead.

"Lucy?" Mia calls out to her sister, her head spinning from the wine she drank during her romantic date. "I have so much to tell you." She exclaims, joy filling her voice, completely unaware of the mess she would find behind the closed door.

Mia's heart finally knocks into its senses. The house is awfully quiet. Under usual circumstances, Lucy would have been behind the front entrance door, her ear pressed against the door eavesdropping at the conversation Cameron and Mia would share. The sweet nothings they would whisper, the kisses they would exchange, the happiness and the promises. But no, not this time. Lucy was not going to share the joy her sister Mia was feeling, she was going to let Mia enjoy it for a moment or two, but once Mia discovers the truth, Lucy would have stolen any chance of happiness away from her.

Mia runs up the stair, oblivious to the eerie creaks the steps allow for as she presses her foot to move onto the next step. Mia runs along the corridor to find the bathroom door tightly shut. Any hint of light escapes and suddenly Mia feels like she is in complete darkness, a whole world separates Lucy from Mia and there is nothing Mia can do.

She bangs on the door, her knuckles flush white and pale but she doesn't care. She bangs and bangs on the wooden door, blood prickles her skin as a splinter pierces her knuckles, but she doesn't give up. She shouts and she screams Lucy's name, calling out for her to open the door, calling out for her sister, the sister she adores.

"Lucy, open the door, come on." She cries hysterically, the warm blood pricks her and stings. She bites away the tears that sting her eyes but she can't give up, not now when she is so close. One more final bang on the door and the hinges unlock. The door swings open to reveal what was supposed to be her young, beautiful sister, plumping her lips with red lipstick and winking back at Mia as if they'd just had a game of hide and seek.

No, what Mia encounters is far from any other day. Lucy is sprawled on the tiles, her head tilted close to her shoulder, her legs slightly apart and her hands flailed above her head. It's like a crime scene. Pills and potions spilled, the empty pill bottle lying in the palm of Lucy's cold hand. Her wrists scarred with blood. How could have Mia missed this? When had she missed her own sister? How could she not see the sadness that seized Lucy? What kind of sister doesn't know and doesn't see the signs?

Mia crashes on the ground, her eyes wide open and her lips hanging open. Silence clings in the air for a few seconds; she doesn't accept what has happened. She freezes, her knees next to her sister's ghostly face. At least Lucy died pretty, Mia thinks. Her lips still faking a smile, perhaps she was happy when she left, Mia thinks.

Realization finally kicks in and she mentally slaps her self for not calling the ambulance sooner. She grabs Lucy's phone that is placed next to the sink. Before she punches the emergency line she finds a video. Lucy wearing the same red dress she is wearing now, the red lips, the eye shadowed eyes. She hesitates for a minute, considering what to do first? Watch the video that may or may not be Lucy confessing the truth, explaining why she did what she did? Or should she contact help, but isn't it too late already?

It wouldn't be right, Mia realises that she needs to call help before sitting through a video of Lucy speaking, explaining, and confessing. Help was on the way and Mia finally found the courage to press play. Her sister, so alive was on the screen. Her skin is youthful and flawless. Her black silky hair is glowing with life. Her blue eyes tell a story that would be retold for ages. Her youth. Her lack of wrinkles prove that she would have more stories to tell; if this was it for her then life would not be worth living for Mia.

Her world shattered, right there and then, right in front of her eyes. The doctors couldn't save her; the pills and the cuts acted their part and took her life. Her body gave up, her heart gave up, she gave up and Mia suffered as a result by blaming herself. After her sister's death, Mia tried to fill the void inside of her through alcohol, a glass of wine, a mojito, sangria ... anything that could burn her inside, concealing her hurt even if just temporarily.

Through her grieving, she had that one person. That one person who reminded her to eat, the person who dried her tears, the person who tried to make her laugh, the person who tried to get her out of the house, the person who helped her shower because Mia couldn't bare showering herself without suffering from panic attacks that involved screaming, hitting the shower wall, slicing the water with her hands as if the water was out to get her. That one person also tucked her in bed, sang to her until she would fall asleep for a while, escape the painful reality that she had just lost her sister. The very same person who held her hand until Mia could find strength on her own two feet, the very same person who escorted Mia at her own sister's funeral.

"I can't do this." Mia whispers as she wipes away the tear rolling on her cheekbone with the back of her hand.

The weather is sad, like everyone here. Rain slashes down onto the grass, mud covering the ladies heels. The pitter-pattering of the rain hits on the tombstone. Grey and lifeless, just like Lucy. The day was supposed to be sunny. The clouds were supposed to open up to a clear sky; the sun's rays should have been like open arms, welcoming Lucy to heaven. Flowers were supposed to be blooming, colouring the mourning faces with a hint of hope. But no, the weather is sad, miserable, gloomy, depressing. Grey. The weather is grey, not a hint of sun, not even a fluffy white cloud. Everyone is sad, even God.

"You can do this, I'm here for you." Ava smiles at Mia and squeezes her hand. The best friends hug, and once their bear hug is over, Ava loops her arm around fragile Mia, pulling her closer. The two girls stand side by side as Lucy is lowered, lower and lower into sadness, into the ground.

Sadness crashes in like thunder, rain pours down everyone. But the flood is evident in Mia. Her eyes red, puffy, and glistening with sadness and tears. Her heart is broken and not even super glue could pick up the pieces. Love has been broken, but love can be mended. Another love could pick up the pieces, stronger than any kind of glue. Friendship, pure friendship could save a life, it could save a life and it has. Ava saving Mia and Mia saving Ava- a friendship that is so strong no thunder, no lighting, no hurricane ... nothing can break.