Rivals [A Sirius Story]

« 15: Uneasy »

« Remus' POV »

"Don't count on it," I say quietly.

All heads snap around to face me. And by "all heads" I mean Severus', Lucius', and Regulus'. No one else is in the Slytherin commons.

"What are you doing here?" Lucius hisses. I step back upon seeing his hostility. "I don't want to cause trouble," I defend.

"You stood behind your friends as they..." Severus trails off, and I have no difficulty figuring out what he was going to say. I shake my head for a moment, inwardly berating myself for nearly thinking of him as Snivellus as my friends do.

The one I was most concerned about having an adverse reaction still hasn't spoken. Regulus is silent, thoughtful, but not necessarily friendly.

"Look – I – "

"I don't want to be around you," Severus interrupts, bitterness twisting his face for a moment. It goes back to normal quickly, but the expression concerns me. I don't like the fear and hatred shown through his eyes as they pierce into my own. Before I lose my courage, I blurt, "Severus, I'm sorry. I never wanted them to fight you, I just – " "You stood beside them," Lucius sneers.

"No," I deny, "I stood behind them."

"Oh, a huge difference that makes! I suppose you believe that justifies it all!" Lucius snaps.

Regulus speaks lowly. "It's what we all do. Are we in any place to judge?"

His friends both turn to him, curiosity and betrayal etched onto their faces.

"Our families," Regulus adds. His words are simple, but his message, to me, is complex. His friends seem to understand instantly. Meanwhile, I try to work out his meaning. Does Regulus mean that he and his friends don't truly support their families? He can't...but then again, am I really in a position to judge the probability of things? With what I am...plus being a nerd, and being friends with the popular people...I'm more improbable than the thought that Lucius and Severus could ever forgive me.

My head is starting to get twisted, so I just organize my thoughts, tucking each one away into a specific drawer as I typically do.

"Undeniable," accepts Severus. Lucius remains in a disbelieving pose, not having it.

"I came here to tell you all something," I say, reluctantly directing focus to myself again. "Oh, really? Thought you wandered in for a little chitchat!" counters Lucius. "Shut up, Ci, let him talk," Regulus mumbles. He's soon afterwards on the receiving end of one of Lucius' famous death glares.

He returns the look with a fearsome expression of his own. Severus rolls his eyes at them both. "Look. I get it. You were scared of standing up to your friends. Doesn't help me much."

"I know," I accept, "and I'm sorry." After a moment, I offer my hand. "Next time, I won't stand by."

Severus hesitantly shakes my hand. He doesn't trust me much, but he wants to.

"Leave."

Lucius, Severus, and I are collectively startled by Regulus' statement. I back away. "I'll go if you want me to..."

"No. Ci, Sev, you guys. Please leave."

At this, Lucius' brows fly up, and he soon begins chanting about how affronted he is.

Severus appears hurt, but attempts to quickly conceal his betrayal. "Come on, Ci, let's go," he mutters, pulling Lucius alongside him as he swiftly moves away.

Obscenities are shouted at me by Lucius until the door to the Slytherin Common Room slams behind the pair.

Regulus approaches me, causing me to regard him with slight shock. I hadn't expected him to want to come near me.

"What?" he asks sharply. "What – what do you mean?" I question, more alarmed than I'd thought I'd be when I was alone with him.

"Why are you here?" he rephrases.

I'm at a blank. How can I explain?

"...I, uh, knew you were there." That was spoken smoothly, Remus. Amazing job. Truly.

They're the ones who listened in! Why do I feel guilty?

"How?" Regulus' speech is more akin to a sharp inhale than normal words.

"I believe one of you laughed at some point." I wonder which one it was. Who gave them away? Couldn't be Severus, he's too self - aware.

He mumbles something along the lines of "Goddamnit, Lucius."

That gives me my answer.

"And I'm assuming you ran straight to your friends as soon as we weren't listening in and spilled?"

The accusation pains me because it's what I should've done. "No," I softly respond.

Wincing, I look up, expecting to see hatred, only to witness the harshness of Regulus' expression falter slightly. "N – no?"

"It...wasn't right," I say quietly, a sigh escaping my mouth. "It didn't feel right," I correct.

Regulus' eyes fly wider open, even, than they were before.

"But I'm going to have to," I add.

His shoulders sink. "Of course," he says coolly.

"Don't take that tone with me," I counter, "I'm doing something comparable to betrayal. For you. Appreciate it."

He gives me an apologetic glance. "Okay. I'm sorry. Thank you."

"Damn right," I murmur, but a small smile takes over my face.

"I don't want you to feel as if you've betrayed your friends."

"It's okay. I'm going to tell them instantly afterwards about all of this, I just...wanted you to have warning. My friends can be...less than admirable. This isn't the first time I've tried to right their wrongs."

"I...okay. Thank you. Again." Blinking twice, I assess Regulus. My eyes focus on his, which are swiftly rotating in all directions.

Nerves?

From Regulus?

We are not close friends, but even I am aware of the fact that he is not easily frazzled. The other Marauders and I discuss it frequently; James will mention how hilariously quickly Severus gets riled up, Peter, who holds a grudge against Lucius because they're different in many ways, and I think because Lucius seems more impressive, will speak about how amusingly irritated Lucius can get. He wants to fit in, Peter does. Poor guy.

No matter how far they delve into the matter, it's difficult to develop a reason to point fingers at Regulus for quickly expressing annoyance (though he quickly develops annoyance – that I've noticed). This pisses off Sirius quite frequently. While James...criticizes Severus and while Peter tries to insult Lucius, Sirius attempts to get a reaction out of Regulus. But he rarely can.

So why is Regulus frazzled?

"I just wanted to warn you," I state.

"I know. Thanks, truly. I appreciate it." Regulus means it, I can tell.

With that, I walk away, not knowing how to feel about our encounter, or why butterflies are now swirling in my stomach.

- word count: 1111 -

Sorry for the slow update!! x