Against the Odds

Chapter Twenty

"So Lex, what do you want to know while you were out?" The two were strolling on the outskirts of New York City.

"Everything. Tell me everything." Lexa breathed in the fresh air.

"Well, Clarke didn't do so well the first couple months. She would barely get out of bed except to visit you and help feed Tia. At night, I would sit outside her door while she cried herself to sleep. I had to take care of Tia for the first couple months." Bellamy let that sink in.

"I thought she was running the business." Lexa was confused.

"She didn't. I did. She started to run it when I forced her to go to a therapist. Tia needed a mother. After a couple of weeks in therapy, I started to see old traces of the Clark I knew. I remember having to force her out of bed to feed her. She did some not so good things to herself while you were gone. She loved you. After a while, she said she wanted to adopt a boy. I thought she was beyond crazy, but her thinking this made her better. She would get out of bed and play with Tia. About 9 months later, we got Aden. He was more messed up than Clarke was. He would wake up bloody screaming. He would thrash around and not let anyone near him except Clarke. Aden eventually let me help him but that wasn't until a long time later. He would crawl into Clarke's bed at night. And I would look after Tia. After a year you had been in a coma, we thought about pulling the plug, but Clarke would never allow it. And her being on the list made her the sole decision. Tia was 1 years old. When we had her birthday party, Clarke flung herself into this project. It was like she had to be doing something to stay sane. Anyway, after a while, she requested to go to work. And I let her. She did great with your business. But she was always doing that. She didn't spend a lot of time with Tia. It was like Tia reminded her of you. Clarke would never admit that but Thad the truth. Aden always ran to her and Tia to me. Tia never exactly knew why this was happening, but she knew her mother didn't wasn't always there. I tried so hard to stay calm with Clarke until one day I snapped. I yelled at her how she wasn't spending time with her daughter. Her child that she allowed to enter the world. I didn't see her the rest of the day. It wasn't until late at night when she came home a bit drunk and unable to stand. When she woke up that morning, she was a new person. She spent more time with Tia. And then she started taking Tia to the hospital to see you. I would visit you sometimes, but eventually I stopped. It was too much for me to bear and keep an eye on everyone. I remember once that when Clarke visited you with Tia she would tell her about how that you were her other mommy. Clarke would just mumble to herself sometimes. She was broken." Bellamy looked relieved to tell someone all that.

"Oh Bell. You had to do that all by yourself. That's...so hard. And what about you?" Lexa stopped walking, "You didn't say one thing about you. Yes, maybe about a little fact, but nothing about how you felt. How you handled it."

"It wasn't me that should be a concern. It's Clarke. How she handles herself when your not around." Bellamy quickly shut that conversation down.

Lexa knew that when this happened, she'd never get anything out of him. She would just have to ask someone else. They walked to Lexa's favorite gelato place.

"Aw man. I miss this Bell." Lexa licked some gelato.

"I could never go to this place while you were gone..." He trailed off.

Lexa sat there in silence. Bellamy a little embarrassed.

"Let's go." Lexa stood up suddenly.

"Go where?" Bell bounced up.

"To all the places you wouldn't while I was gone." Lexa pulled on Bellamy's hand.

"Come on. It's already 4 in the afternoon." Bell laughed as they ran.

"So, since when did you care about this shit?" Lexa laughed.

"I didn't. What can I say? Do whatever the hell you want." Bellamy ran up next to her.

"Where to first?" Lexa started skipping.

"Um well I haven't really gone to Heda Incorp or to that toy shop." Bellamy took long strides.

"You haven't been to Heda Incorp in two years?!?" Lexa halted.

"Yeah. I couldn't go there seeing your face. We all have our ways of coping with loss." Bellamy was a little farther ahead. 

"We need to go there first then. I haven't been back so let's go." They hopped onto the subway.

"Alright. But from what I've heard, it's changed." Bellamy gripped on the handle.

"Eh. It's been two years." Lexa had to sit down.

The two arrived at Heda Incorp. There was a new design layout and lots of changes.