Cri De Coeur ||Mikayuu||

⚜37⚜

"Colette perplexes me sometimes. I can't pinpoint her emotions on the Ringleader. She doesn't seem to want him harmed, despite the fact that she's been through as much as the rest of us." Mika groaned, legs dangling over the railing, slumped far into the seat, pulling the hood over his eyes.
"I mean, I love her to death, truly, but she seems... Blinded. Does that make sense?" He asked, messing with my hoodie zipper, staring ahead with a surprisingly serious look in his eyes. Not gonna lie- it was attractive.
"In a way. She's really stubborn with protecting him for some reason, and I used to think you would know why."
"I don't. Pretty unfortunate. She... Forgot about her life before she could get the courage to tell me." He laughed, picking at a loose thread on the hoodie.
"But how do you know that?" I asked myself before I stopped to think about it properly.

"She knows a few things. Nothing's forgotten forever. Just her old profession, who she was experimented with, her age, and her family. She told me herself. Imagine that. Telling a twelve year old that you can't remember who you were." He smiled wryly. It dropped when his eyes froze in place. Not in alert. He was zoning out, I think. He went back to his previous state three minutes later.
"Anyway, it's not important. She's arrogant and I'm fine with it. Yeah. Fine." He said the last part as if convincing himself.

"You're gonna be fine, but you're not okay with her situation. We're gonna be alright once common knowledge gets knocked into her. Not literally, though. That would be bad. Maybe if we just whisper words like 'you hate the ringleader' in her ear when she's sleeping.... Anyways. Don't say you're fine with this 'cause you're not and we both know this. So we gotta fix it with every other thing you seem to convince yourself you're fine with." It was silent, as if he was processing it.

"I think you broke him. Good going, asshole. You broke your boyfriend."

Then Mika burst out laughing.

"Yup. You broke him."

Mika looked at me, eyes wavering, as if they didn't want to stay locked with mine. But the stubbornly remained.
"Everything you're saying is starting to make sense. God, I must be going mad."
I was shocked to hear him say that. What did he mean by it making sense? It didn't before?

"Mika... I'm saying what any normal person would say to comfort someone. You're not going crazy." I could see the gears turning in his head. He seemed hurt for a second, before he laughed it off.

"Guess I'm finally becoming a normal functioning human being."

God, he's learned to laugh off the pain.

I wasn't expecting that so soon.

"Don't say that. You've always been normal. Just put into a really weird position. Okay? Don't think negatively. It scares me." I took his hand, lacing my fingers with his.
"Sorry. Can't help it." He mumbled, returning the gesture.
"I know you can't." I sighed.

"How can you be so calm about everything?" Mika asked, out stretching his fingers and putting them back in my grip. Repeating the motion.
"I'm not. I mean, you've seen my foul mouth to the ringleader. And what that earns me." I said, pulling down my collar to showcase the bruise on my collarbone, courtesy of main asshole number one from last night's show for horsing around with Mika after the show.
I've learned to live with it.

"I'm never calm, Mika. I'm always worried you're gonna get hurt, or one of us is gonna die from the abuse, or if I'm gonna end up hurting you.. I'm afraid of that the most. I didn't have the time to get to know my abilities and if they can hurt anyone- including me- like you have. I'm scared of what I don't know." I grumbled. Something about him made the truth constantly spill from me like a waterfall.
"You can hurt me. I know you can." Mika did, hurting me in a way I couldn't properly explain.
"A demon is far more dangerous than a vampire. We- they're not capable of fully body possession and... Whatever you can do. But you won't hurt me. That's a fact. And the demon in your mind won't harm me either because he knows who's in my head. Another fact. So I think we're good; at least until we decide to escape. Then I'm gonna need you to be willing to hurt someone. But you don't have to. It's... A last resort." Mika said, voice faltering at the last sentences.
It wasn't a completely comforting response. But he was trying, and that helped comfort me. Slightly.

"We should probably head back." I mumbled, watching Mika accidentally doze off and startle himself back to consciousness. He nodded. Since the roles seemed to switch from a long while ago, he leaned on me as we walked still half asleep, my senses fully awake with a shocking adrenaline rush from thin air.

"When we get back to Boston, I wanna go on dates with you." He mumbled into my shoulder.
"Okay, Mika." I said, amused by his borderline drunken state.
"And I want to go back to school."

"We'll make that happen."

"Thank you, Yuu. Hey, that rhymes. Why does it rhyme."

"You still smell like a forest. Is that weird?" Mika asked as he was struggling to stay awake in bed.

"Kinda. How do I smell like a forest?" I asked, strands of his hair falling from my fingertips.

"It's not like a forest in general, mostly a bunch of nice smells that fit in a forest setting. You kinda smell like morning dew and trees, both old and new. I really like it. But I'm afraid you won't always smell like that." He mused.

"Considering you're the only one that's seemed to notice or smell it, I think you'll be fine." I reassured him. Mika smiled drowsily, kissing my neck. He stayed there for a long time, before his head fell off.

He fell asleep.

Something only this wonderful bastard is capable of.

I found it amusing.

How I managed to fall in love with such an adorable and wonderful person.