pause // dan howell x reader

Chapter 18 - Trace

Your POV

"When should we start?" Dan put his hands on his crutches.

"I guess, now." You shrug and continue walking along the lonesome stone path in the park. The eerie silence still flooding your ears.

"How should I do this?" You ponder and pop your lips, glancing over to Dan.

"Do it however you want to." He smiles and fixes his fringe with one hand.

"Okay... Lesson 1." You laugh, unable to take yourself seriously.

"Unpausing time. It takes one simple word to do it-"

"Play." Dan blurts. The night breeze comes back and whimsically flows through your hair. The chirping of the birds, the crickets and the rushing of the nearby river are all alive again.

"What? How did you know that?" You stop walking and widen your eyes at him in disbelief.

"I heard you say it once, in the studio." He explains, his eyes scanning the moss in between the cracks of the stone.

"But- Oh, right. I forgot that you can go through time." You mumble, blushing.

"What do you mean?" Dan steps towards you and looks into your eyes intently.

"I may have already known that you had this ability." You confess with a sheepish smile.

"How?" He furrows his eyebrows.

"Oh you know, just a few little moments. I guess I forgot in the studio, I wasn't thinking straight anyway." You shake your head and glimpse up at him.

"Y/N!" You hear someone yell. Both you and Dan snap your heads to the sound.

"You disappeared. What happened?" Alfie questions and starts lumbering towards you.

"Dan?" Alfie clenches his jaw, anger transforming his face.

"Dan, say 'pause'." You murmur through your teeth and clutch Dan's arm.

Dan's POV

"Say 'pause'." Y/N repeats stubbornly.

I shut my eyes tightly and think about it. The word pause. I give it attachment - raw passion - something I feel whenever I think about Y/N. I take control of the word and soon enough, I have it.

"Pause." I utter. Alfie's body stops same with the environment around us. I look over to Y/N who has a wild grin spread across her face.

"You did it Dan!" She cheers and jumps next to me.

"I guess I did." I chuckle, smiling to myself.

"Come on, let's go. It's late." She pats my back and begins walking away from Alfie again.

"That really happened. I can actually do that." I huff in amazement.

"Of course you can. You're Dan Howell." Y/N rests an arm around my body as I crutch along the footpath. We walk out of the park in complete and comfortable silence.

"Y/N?" I turn my head to hers and she hums back.

"What was Alfie doing with you when I got there?" I ask and shame spreads over her cheeks, heating them as it travels across.

"He was about to kiss me." She cowers. I keep walking forward, not a single change in my expression but on the inside, my heart sinks to the bottom of the ocean.

"Why?" I question blandly.

"I don't know, he's meant to be with Zoe." Y/N's hair falls around her face as she looks down at the pavement.

"Do you want him to be with you instead?"

"No, not at all." She insists and I nod my head.

"Alfie tends to do that. Tries to get with other girls outside of Zoe." I explain.

"This has happened before?" Y/N puzzles. A beam of light crosses her face, making her eyes glimmer.

"Yeah, a few times that I've noticed. It's actually how he got Zoe. Back then she was dating some jerk, I can't remember his stupid name, and then Alfie came into the picture. The guys had a battle for her and somehow Alfie won." I recall and Y/N blinks at the ground.

"All that competition and Alfie goes behind her back." She states and I mumble disappointingly.

"I don't want you to be involved in that."

"Neither do I." She agrees and rubs my back.

"I thought he was a nice friend though, he was there for me." She says, slightly in denial.

"Y/N don't. You don't want to be one of those girls, think about Zoe."

Your POV

"I know, Zoe's my friend. I don't want to ever do that to her but Alfie didn't seem like he was interested." You sigh. Maybe Dan is right. You were naive and didn't see any of Alfie's advances, then you got blindsided on top of that bridge.

You peer up ahead and see that your house is nearby.

"Are you okay going home alone?" You ask anxiously.

"Yeah I'll be fine." Dan turns on his crutch as you reach your flat.

"Well, today's been a day." You laugh and stand up on the bottom step.

"One very, very long day." He nods, smiling.

"You still look fabulous in your suit." You remark whilst playing with his tie. Dan blushes, glancing away from your eyes.

"Sorry about that by the way." He apologises. Oh right, Dan and F/N are dating.

"It's fine, you can date whoever you want. It was just a shock because F/N lied to me. She said she was going on a date with someone else." You shrug.

"F/N and I aren't a thing. It was just a- I don't know." He shakes his head.

"You don't have to explain yourself to me, seriously, it's fine. Anyway, I'll see you at work in three days." You enthusiastically point and click your fingers. Then you turn towards the door.

"Wait Y/N. You're forgetting something." Dan smirks and you look over your shoulder, later turning to face him.

"Lesson 1: unpausing time." He continues and takes a breath.

"Play." He huffs. The cars behind him are still a blur of lights and the sounds of the city are quiet.

"I think we still need to work on that, Daniel." You remark and he chuckles, embarrassed.

"Yet another reason why I'm a fail."

"Yet another reason you need to shut up." You shove his chest lightly. He's not a failure, he never will be.

"Bye Y/N." He smiles, the crinkles appearing near his eyes and his dimple indenting his cheek.

"Bye Dan." You poke his dimple, making him roll his eyes. You turn around and unlock the front door.

"Play." You whisper as you walk through the doorway.

After prancing up the stairs to your floor, you unlock another door. As soon as you step into the apartment something is missing. You wander further in and peek your head into the hallway.

F/N's room door is open and the darkness is all you can see. You walk over to it and flick on the light switch.

Empty. It's all gone, all of her stuff. Her trace. Yet something inside you knows that tonight is not the last you'll see of her.  

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